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| Porn Users Forum » SEX JOKES ... VOL. III |
| 1-5 of 5 Posts | Page 1 |
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| 04-05-17 11:45am - 2818 days | Original Post - #1 | |
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Darius (0)
Suspended  Posts: 46 Registered: Aug 11, '16 |
SEX JOKES ... VOL. III Tough crowd... jeez. Okay, here we go again. i) A penguin takes his car to the shop, and the mechanic says he needs an hour to check it out. So the penguin goes across the street to the 7-Eleven to kill some time and get an ice cream. Since the penguin has no hands, the poor little guy gets the ice cream all over his beak. He returns to the mechanic and the guy tells him, "Looks like you blew a seal." "Oh no," says the penguin, "this is just a little ice cream." ii) Q: What's the difference between yo momma and a washing machine? A: When I drop a load in the washing machine, it doesn't follow me around for a week. iii) A man walks into a pub and asks for 12 shots of vodka. The barman says, "Wow, 12. Are you celebrating?" The man replies, "I've just experienced my first blow job." The barman says, "That's brilliant. Let me get you another one on the house." The man replies, "No, that's okay. If the twelfth one doesn't get the taste out of my mouth nothing will." iv) Just had a dangerous mole removed from the end of my penis. Definitely won't be shagging one of those again. v) My lesbian neighbors gave me a Rolex for my birthday. It's nice, but I think they misunderstood me when I said, "I wanna watch." -D | |
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| 04-05-17 01:09pm - 2818 days | #2 | |
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Drooler (0)
Disabled User  Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA |
ii and iv had me laughing What did the cannibal say when he came home and found his wife chopping up a python and a pygmy? Oh no, not snake and pygmy pie again! I wanted something new, so I left England for New England. Edited on Apr 05, 2017, 01:19pm | |
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| 04-05-17 05:56pm - 2817 days | #3 | |
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pat362 (0)
Active User  Posts: 3,575 Registered: Jan 23, '07 Location: canada |
^Yeah I have to concur with you. III and IV are the best. Yours is also quite good. Long live the Brown Coats. | |
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| 04-06-17 08:33am - 2817 days | #4 | |
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merc77 (0)
Disabled User Posts: 291 Registered: Apr 17, '16 |
What's the difference between a rooster and your Momma? A rooster goes cockadoodledoo and your Momma goes Any cock will do. (An oldie from junior high.) "Dogs think people are Gods. Cats don't as they know better." - Kedi (2016) Dogs have masters; Cats have staff. | |
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| 04-06-17 08:47am - 2817 days | #5 | |
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Drooler (0)
Disabled User Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA |
Why don't women blink during foreplay? There isn't enough time. ------------------------------- How is a new wife like a tornado? First, there's a lot of sucking and blowing, and then you lose your house. ------------------------------- As I became a young man, my dad had a lot of advice for me. I remember he sat me down once, and he said, "Son, don't go to any of those really cheap, dirty, nasty, sleazy strip clubs because if you do, you'll see something you shouldn't." So of course I went, and I saw my dad. (This is pretty much taken from a joke Rick Wakeman told at the Yes induction at the Rock 'n Hall of Fame.) I wanted something new, so I left England for New England. Edited on Apr 09, 2017, 08:32pm | |
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