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| Porn Users Forum » Random Levity |
| 1-46 of 46 Posts | Page 1 |
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| 10-02-13 09:49pm - 4061 days | Original Post - #1 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User  Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Random Levity Alright, the forum has been way too quiet as of recent and filled with too many people saying "adios amigos" in lieu of the upcoming demise of this corner of cyberspace. Guess it's time for me take another brain dump with just a few random thoughts caused by excessive brain damage and too much time looking at porn. Feel free to add you own to this thread: If you really like someone but can't seem to escape the "friend zone" to take it to the next level does that mean your serving time in Palcatraz? If someone doesn't believe that they'll ever get laid does that make them a sexual atheist? If a cop pulls you over for drunk driving can you get let off by saying "In dog beers, I've only had one ... ossiffer." This one basically speaks for itself ... and maybe Drooler: With all the famous tag lines movie stars have had over the years I often wonder no porn stars have every tried to come up with one. You know, some porn starlet could squint and say before every come shot "Go ahead, make my day" or something similar. If I ever started a vegan porn site -- a yet undeveloped niche that would involve no pussy/beaver eating but lots of cream fillings -- I'd make sure my porn stunt dick bellowed out this line at the start of every scene: And, last for now, what the members of Congress are currently doing during our fabulous government shut down: | |
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| 10-02-13 10:57pm - 4060 days | #2 | |
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RagingBuddhist (0)
Disabled User  Posts: 893 Registered: Jan 23, '07 |
 Sarcasm is a body's natural defense against stupidity. | |
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| 10-03-13 03:51pm - 4060 days | #3 | |
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Drooler (0)
Disabled User  Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA |
Could also be the other way around ... And here are a few more catch phrases and such: All right, Mr. Demented, I'm ready for my cum shot. E.T. need foam ... Big Fur Burger? [...] This IS a tasty burger! Plastics. (And, of course): Porn, for lack of a better word, is good. I wanted something new, so I left England for New England. Edited on Oct 10, 2013, 12:39pm | |
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| 10-03-13 09:22pm - 4060 days | #4 | |
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turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
Hey, isn't that Dmitry Medvedev, ex-Russian President? Whatever you do, don't imply that that balloon makes him look gay!  (And I promise not to post a photo of Putin bare-chested.)Thanks for the laughs...especially knowing that members of congress still get paid when they shut the federal government down.  "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove Edited on Oct 05, 2013, 04:08pm | |
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| 10-03-13 09:31pm - 4060 days | #5 | |
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turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
 The real quotes from that movie are hilarious. Just some of the ones from Gordon Gekko: - "When I get a hold of the son of a bitch who leaked this, I'm gonna tear his eyeballs out and I'm gonna suck his fucking skull." - "Yeah. Well you TAKE IT! Right in the ass you fucking scumbag cocksucker!" - "What's worth doing is worth doing for money." I figure this one must framed and posted in the offices of most porn companies. "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove | |
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| 10-08-13 06:00am - 4055 days | #6 | |
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jberryl69 (0)
Disabled User  Posts: 1,000 Registered: Nov 27, '10 Location: neverland |
From a routine by Robin Williams (@4:10): "... and girls, if you want to get that lovely tattoo of the sun rising out of your ass crack, gorgeous when you're twenty, but at 50 it's an octopus chasing a fucking starfish." One of the funnest monologues I've heard Robin do is about golf. enjoy. If it ain't grits, it must be a Yankee. If you're going to lay her head over the pool table and fuck her throat, get your fucking hand off her throat! | |
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| 10-08-13 12:23pm - 4055 days | #7 | |
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beautifulrock (0)
Suspended  Posts: 21 Registered: Oct 06, '13 Location: CT |
George Carlin nuff said. No, I will not fuck your mother simply because she's depressed that your dad left her for a albino tranny. Edited by Staff on Oct 08, 2013, 02:52pm (Khan: excessive blank lines deleted) | |
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| 10-08-13 12:27pm - 4055 days | #8 | |
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jberryl69 (0)
Disabled User Posts: 1,000 Registered: Nov 27, '10 Location: neverland |
^ - Would you so mind deleting the blank space? While I get the impression you're trying to leave, it's a bit over the top don't you think? If it ain't grits, it must be a Yankee. If you're going to lay her head over the pool table and fuck her throat, get your fucking hand off her throat! | |
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| 10-08-13 10:24pm - 4054 days | #9 | |
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beautifulrock (0)
Suspended Posts: 21 Registered: Oct 06, '13 Location: CT |
What the hell are you talking about? Stop being so anal retentive. No, I will not fuck your mother simply because she's depressed that your dad left her for a albino tranny. | |
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| 10-08-13 10:38pm - 4054 days | #10 | |
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RagingBuddhist (0)
Disabled User Posts: 893 Registered: Jan 23, '07 |
Are you aware that this isn't the usual slimy, anything goes porn forum? Sarcasm is a body's natural defense against stupidity. | |
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| 10-09-13 01:05am - 4054 days | #11 | |
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turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
Lewis Black has a routine about golfers too. Hilarious, and since he admits to being one himself it may explain why he sounds so angry: "I am a golfer, and that is a Scottish word, and it means asshole."  "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove | |
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| 10-09-13 01:12am - 4054 days | #12 | |
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beautifulrock (0)
Suspended Posts: 21 Registered: Oct 06, '13 Location: CT |
And are you aware that the traffic on this forum isn't high enough to be picky? Also, what was so slimy about my post? I'll wait. No, I will not fuck your mother simply because she's depressed that your dad left her for a albino tranny. Edited by Staff on Oct 09, 2013, 05:57am (Khan: excessive blank space deleted) | |
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| 10-09-13 03:43am - 4054 days | #13 | |
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RagingBuddhist (0)
Disabled User Posts: 893 Registered: Jan 23, '07 |
What does the amount of traffic have to do with anything? The fact that you don't know what was wrong with your post shows you're out of your element here. Sarcasm is a body's natural defense against stupidity. | |
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| 10-09-13 03:50am - 4054 days | #14 | |
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beautifulrock (0)
Suspended Posts: 21 Registered: Oct 06, '13 Location: CT |
Wow, yes, I'm clearly out of my element. I wasn't aware I was amongst ultra-sensitive vaginas with an extreme obsessive compulsive attitude toward post ettiquette. Perhaps this isn't the forum for me. Could you please point me to the usual slimy, anything goes porn forum, where I clearly belong? No, I will not fuck your mother simply because she's depressed that your dad left her for a albino tranny. | |
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| 10-09-13 03:52am - 4054 days | #15 | |
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RagingBuddhist (0)
Disabled User Posts: 893 Registered: Jan 23, '07 |
Lewis Black is awesome! Got to love someone who can make you laugh at all the things that piss you off about life here in the U.S. Sarcasm is a body's natural defense against stupidity. | |
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| 10-09-13 06:17am - 4054 days | #16 | |
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Khan (0)
Suspended  Posts: 1,737 Registered: Jan 05, '07 Location: USA |
I suspect he's referring to your put-down of jberryl69. I know it's probably a little different from other forums you may visit but we ask that you refrain from personal attacks, name-calling and put-downs of fellow users. It helps maintain this forum as a friendly and non-intimidating community. With so many subjects being discussed where people are likely to have strong likes and dislikes, treating others with respect (and expecting to be treated with respect in return) is the surest way to keep this a civil place for users to exchange thoughts. Might I suggest you give it a try. I think you may be pleasantly surprised at the result. Former PornUsers Senior Administrator Now at: MyPorn.com "To get your ideas across use small words, big ideas, and short sentences."-John Henry Patterson | |
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| 10-09-13 09:42am - 4054 days | #17 | |
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beautifulrock (0)
Suspended Posts: 21 Registered: Oct 06, '13 Location: CT |
Sorry, that is not me. If you have a problem with how i act, ban me now. I won't censor myself simply to be pleasant. That's absurd. It's also the reason this board is deader than Hailey Paige. If your heads weren't so firmly entrenched up your gaping assholes you would realize that. No, I will not fuck your mother simply because she's depressed that your dad left her for a albino tranny. | |
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| 10-09-13 12:25pm - 4054 days | #18 | |
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Khan (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,737 Registered: Jan 05, '07 Location: USA |
These are rules you agreed to follow when you created your account. While we hope it doesn't come to that, if you continue to disrespect your fellow users, you will not be welcome here. It's really not that hard to be civil. Added later: as you've asked us to delete your account, I guess you felt civility wasn't for you. Sorry it worked out like that. Former PornUsers Senior Administrator Now at: MyPorn.com "To get your ideas across use small words, big ideas, and short sentences."-John Henry Patterson Edited on Oct 09, 2013, 02:32pm | |
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| 10-09-13 02:26pm - 4054 days | #19 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Well, leave it to me for inserting a little "random levity" into the forum  | |
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| 10-09-13 02:33pm - 4054 days | #20 | |
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Khan (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,737 Registered: Jan 05, '07 Location: USA |
'twas nothing wrong with the thread. Former PornUsers Senior Administrator Now at: MyPorn.com "To get your ideas across use small words, big ideas, and short sentences."-John Henry Patterson | |
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| 10-09-13 05:43pm - 4054 days | #21 | |
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RagingBuddhist (0)
Disabled User Posts: 893 Registered: Jan 23, '07 |
TIS nothing wrong with this thread!  ********************* beautifulrock - If you happen to be reading this, I'd like to try to explain something to you. You may think this is a forum full of candy-assed lightweights but you weren't really a part of it long enough to see what it really is. I doubt you'll ever find a porn-related forum full of thinking, good-humored and good-natured folks anywhere. We've had plenty of heated arguments over the years but no one's gone out of the way to be blatantly insulting. There's no need for it - and that's coming from someone who is by no means the most pleasant person on here. I've shown my edge more than a few times on here but that's almost exclusively been reserved for webmasters with insulting attitudes. The people on here have always just accepted others as they are and don't deserve to shown the slightest bit of disrespect. From your "smells like" post, I can see you have a good warped sense of humor. I, for one, would welcome you back if you could see your way to directing the heat towards people who deserve it. My  Sarcasm is a body's natural defense against stupidity. | |
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| 10-09-13 05:54pm - 4054 days | #22 | |
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graymane (0)
Suspended  Posts: 1,411 Registered: Feb 20, '10 Location: Virginia |
Pardon me for buttin' in. But what I'm seeing here is a mound of contention which, so far, is building into a very unpleasant certainty. And the sad thing about all this is that an up and coming new member, whose generous contributions to this site have heretofore received an unusually positive reception from the established regulars, has suddenly revealed his intent to bend the rules if, and when, in his mind he feels it's justified.... even though being banned is imminent should he implement such an action. I have a certain respect for beautifulrock for standing up for what he believes in. But for the life of me, I fail to understand why, having been addressed by our administer, who, in the most diplomatic, and particularly with politeness far beyond anything I have seen in writing or in the spoken word, that beautifulrock would willfully, and with some indignation, staunchly not accept the conditions. I'd like to see beautifulrock remain on board and share with us the gift of his wit. But, I guess we'll wait and see. | |
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| 10-09-13 06:28pm - 4054 days | #23 | |
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pat362 (0)
Active User  Posts: 3,575 Registered: Jan 23, '07 Location: canada |
^It is too bad that he thought the rules shouldn't apply to him but then again he isn't the only person on the net who believes like that. I think that is probably one of the worst things the net has created. We now have a class of people who have no problem insulting other people in the name of being true to themselves. It's easy to call someone an asshole behind a computer screen but I wonder if these honest people have the same honesty when faced with an actual asshole in the real world? Long live the Brown Coats. | |
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| 10-09-13 06:34pm - 4054 days | #24 | |
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turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
The Internet strikes again, Graymane!  Give it enough time and it'll reveal itself as the ugly, hateful id of everyone with access to a computer. I think it's just the presumed cloak of anonymity that gives everyone the license to scream out their prejudices without the slightest thought for what they're actually saying. The web throws out the maxim of "think before you speak" by being able to step in to help fart out your first thought or urge before you have the chance have any second thoughts (this could also explain why we have so many regrets once we've paid to join a site and have had time to think about it further). I know I'm a diehard cynic but a spend a little time on almost any site or forum and you don't come away with the highest opinion of the human race. The mantras of "Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, and fuck you!" "Fuck this, GAY!" and "I don't actually hate ____, but..." can really wear you down. Frankly, the cries of censorship fall flat in the face of pointlessly mean comment sections that end up saying more about the commenters than the subject at hand. Popular Science took the bold step of just shutting off the comment sections on new articles starting last month. Sounds unpopular and antidemocratic but a magazine that has science in its title probably doesn't need the intelligentsia that claim to have been educated by the University of Google. Fortunately, Yahoo! News and YouTube still keep pumping the nonsense effluence out at full capacity!  "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove | |
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| 10-09-13 06:42pm - 4054 days | #25 | |
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turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
True, and we do this to a certain extent in our offline daily lives. We interact in some pretty different ways with a boss, friend, partner, family member, or a cop. The web takes this to an extreme and apparently turns the lot of us into virtual GG Allins, where we just start shitting onstage and tossing it at anybody willing to listen!  "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove | |
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| 10-10-13 12:17pm - 4053 days | #26 | |
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Khan (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,737 Registered: Jan 05, '07 Location: USA |
And returning to the initial topic ... What were they thinking?    Former PornUsers Senior AdministratorNow at: MyPorn.com "To get your ideas across use small words, big ideas, and short sentences."-John Henry Patterson | |
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| 10-10-13 12:46pm - 4053 days | #27 | |
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Drooler (0)
Disabled User Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA |
About Khan's picks of the RR tracks, you can see in the first one that some of the track is overgrown with grass. I wonder if the structure above was complete at an earlier time, but part of it was removed later. Y'know, for safety's sake! Or ... for a supporting role in a future Darwin Award perhaps? And the last picture might have been on the same train line as the first. No longer in use. (Big Oil strikes again.) I know, I'm just thinking up possible explanations. And the security camera/monitor juxtaposition? Perhaps that was a bit of third party outsourcing x2 ... obviously with just the right amount of "oversight." I wanted something new, so I left England for New England. Edited on Oct 10, 2013, 01:02pm | |
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| 10-10-13 02:56pm - 4053 days | #28 | |
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Tree Rodent (0)
Active User  Posts: 708 Registered: Oct 29, '08 Location: UK |
They are brilliant photos though! | |
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| 10-11-13 09:49am - 4052 days | #29 | |
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Khan (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,737 Registered: Jan 05, '07 Location: USA |
Here's a few others from the what were thay thinking dept.   Have a great weekend! Former PornUsers Senior Administrator Now at: MyPorn.com "To get your ideas across use small words, big ideas, and short sentences."-John Henry Patterson | |
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| 10-11-13 01:20pm - 4052 days | #30 | |
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Tree Rodent (0)
Active User Posts: 708 Registered: Oct 29, '08 Location: UK |
OMG splashback. For some reason they make me chuckle. Looks almost like Darwin Award material. | |
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| 10-11-13 02:55pm - 4052 days | #32 | |
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turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
One looks to be slightly shorter than the other, so maybe it's when a father and son go in and the dad wants to keep an eye on him (and not in a creepy way!). But not even a small divider there--is there anything worse than going into a public bathroom and thinking They didn't finish this one, there are no dividers!? Still, nothing beats the outdoor urinals that seem so prevalent in European cities. Just a gray plastic obelisk with some holes in it so guys aren't marking their territory on the nearest wall or alleyway.  "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove Edited on Oct 11, 2013, 03:22pm (turboshaft: spelling) | |
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| 10-11-13 03:15pm - 4052 days | #33 | |
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Drooler (0)
Disabled User Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA |
The escalator to ceiling and the steps to the wall look like they could have been on Pink Floyd album covers. I wanted something new, so I left England for New England. | |
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| 10-12-13 06:19am - 4051 days | #34 | |
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jberryl69 (0)
Disabled User Posts: 1,000 Registered: Nov 27, '10 Location: neverland |
If you're going to lay her head over the pool table and fuck her throat, get your fucking hand off her throat! Edited on Oct 12, 2013, 05:04pm | |
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| 10-12-13 11:10am - 4051 days | #35 | |
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Khan (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,737 Registered: Jan 05, '07 Location: USA |
jberryl69, for whatever reason, your image didn't display. If you want to email it to me, I'll put it on my server and send you the URL so you can try again. Former PornUsers Senior Administrator Now at: MyPorn.com "To get your ideas across use small words, big ideas, and short sentences."-John Henry Patterson | |
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| 10-12-13 03:16pm - 4051 days | #36 | |
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RagingBuddhist (0)
Disabled User Posts: 893 Registered: Jan 23, '07 |
This would be a good time to ask if anyone knows which image hosts are whitelisted for this site. I know I could use my Photobucket account but, for the sake of keeping posts on this "evil" site separate from the rest of my prim and proper life :cough:, I'd rather use something anonymous. Sarcasm is a body's natural defense against stupidity. | |
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| 10-12-13 03:31pm - 4051 days | #37 | |
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Khan (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,737 Registered: Jan 05, '07 Location: USA |
Sorry, I don't know. All I could suggest is maybe look at some back posts (or threads) where images are posted using a free image host to see which ones seem to work ok. Sorry I couldn't help more. Former PornUsers Senior Administrator Now at: MyPorn.com "To get your ideas across use small words, big ideas, and short sentences."-John Henry Patterson | |
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| 10-12-13 04:02pm - 4051 days | #38 | |
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turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
Is your "prim and proper life" still full of rage though?  "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove | |
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| 10-12-13 05:05pm - 4051 days | #39 | |
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jberryl69 (0)
Disabled User Posts: 1,000 Registered: Nov 27, '10 Location: neverland |
Khan - ignore my e-mail and check and see if this doesn't work better. I posted the link via an e-mail account which I just noticed. Just let me know If it ain't grits, it must be a Yankee. If you're going to lay her head over the pool table and fuck her throat, get your fucking hand off her throat! | |
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| 10-12-13 05:42pm - 4051 days | #40 | ||
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RagingBuddhist (0)
Disabled User Posts: 893 Registered: Jan 23, '07 |
It's okay - I'll figure it out. I was just being lazy.
You should know the answer to that by now LOL (especially since I put that in quotes) Sarcasm is a body's natural defense against stupidity. | ||
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| 10-12-13 06:54pm - 4051 days | #41 | |
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Khan (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,737 Registered: Jan 05, '07 Location: USA |
Sorry, you lost me. If what doesn't work better? "posted the link via an e-mail account ..." Sorry, I don't understand.  FWIW, clicking on the link or pasting it into my browser returns the same result, a 400 - Bad Request error I'm not usually this thick but I'm just not following you. Former PornUsers Senior Administrator Now at: MyPorn.com "To get your ideas across use small words, big ideas, and short sentences."-John Henry Patterson | |
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| 10-12-13 06:57pm - 4051 days | #42 | |
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Khan (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,737 Registered: Jan 05, '07 Location: USA |
My guess is it shoiuld work with most of the popular services. Just make sure they allow hotlinking to forum threads and don't have a problem with adult forums. Holler if I can help further. Former PornUsers Senior Administrator Now at: MyPorn.com "To get your ideas across use small words, big ideas, and short sentences."-John Henry Patterson | |
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| 10-13-13 06:14am - 4050 days | #43 | |
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jberryl69 (0)
Disabled User Posts: 1,000 Registered: Nov 27, '10 Location: neverland |
You might consider the following free service - Wikispaces Because I have family and personal photos displayed I will post the photos I want to share out of my "stash" of photos and not the one the public sees. If it ain't grits, it must be a Yankee. If you're going to lay her head over the pool table and fuck her throat, get your fucking hand off her throat! | |
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| 10-13-13 09:12am - 4050 days | #44 | |
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jberryl69 (0)
Disabled User Posts: 1,000 Registered: Nov 27, '10 Location: neverland |
Finally, after failing several times and being assisted by our very knowledgeable leader, here is the photo I wanted to add. If it ain't grits, it must be a Yankee.If you're going to lay her head over the pool table and fuck her throat, get your fucking hand off her throat! | |
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| 10-15-13 08:14pm - 4048 days | #45 | |
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Khan (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,737 Registered: Jan 05, '07 Location: USA |
Here's the last three I have of this set. They seem to fall into the category of, "we don't need no stinkin plans".    enjoy Former PornUsers Senior Administrator Now at: MyPorn.com "To get your ideas across use small words, big ideas, and short sentences."-John Henry Patterson | |
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| 10-19-13 04:36pm - 4044 days | #46 | |
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Drooler (0)
Disabled User Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA |
Reminds me of that Randy Newman song "Short People." (You gotta be really tall to make it there!) I wanted something new, so I left England for New England. | |
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| 10-19-13 05:15pm - 4044 days | #47 | |
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Tree Rodent (0)
Active User Posts: 708 Registered: Oct 29, '08 Location: UK |
LOL! Looked at the middle one and thought, there's nothing wrong with that balcony. Duh. | |
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