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| Porn Users Forum » The Porn Myth by Naomi Wolf |
| 1-8 of 8 Posts | Page 1 |
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| 10-31-11 12:32pm - 4801 days | Original Post - #1 | |
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Cybertoad (0)
Disabled User  Posts: 2,158 Registered: Jan 01, '08 Location: Wash |
The Porn Myth by Naomi Wolf Thought some might like this intersting read. The Porn Myth In the end, porn doesn't whet men's appetites—it turns them off the real thing. By Naomi Wolf At a benefit the other night, I saw Andrea Dworkin, the anti-porn activist most famous in the eighties for her conviction that opening the floodgates of pornography would lead men to see real women in sexually debased ways. If we did not limit pornography, she argued—before Internet technology made that prospect a technical impossibility—most men would come to objectify women as they objectified porn stars, and treat them accordingly. In a kind of domino theory, she predicted, rape and other kinds of sexual mayhem would surely follow. The feminist warrior looked gentle and almost frail. The world she had, Cassandra-like, warned us about so passionately was truly here: Porn is, as David Amsden says, the “wallpaper” of our lives now. So was she right or wrong? Not Tonight, Honey. I'm Logging On.: Internet porn is everywhere; even "nice" guys are hooked. So where does that leave their girlfriends? By David Amsden (October 20, 2003) The New Position on Casual Sex: The rise of Internet dating has brought a sexual openness (not to mention one-night stands) to the younger generation not seen since the seventies heyday of Maxwell's Plum. But can there be too much of a good thing? By Vanessa Grigoriadis (January 13, 2003) She was right about the warning, wrong about the outcome. As she foretold, pornography did breach the dike that separated a marginal, adult, private pursuit from the mainstream public arena. The whole world, post-Internet, did become pornographized. Young men and women are indeed being taught what sex is, how it looks, what its etiquette and expectations are, by pornographic training—and this is having a huge effect on how they interact. But the effect is not making men into raving beasts. On the contrary: The onslaught of porn is responsible for deadening male libido in relation to real women, and leading men to see fewer and fewer women as “porn-worthy.” Far from having to fend off porn-crazed young men, young women are worrying that as mere flesh and blood, they can scarcely get, let alone hold, their attention. Here is what young women tell me on college campuses when the subject comes up: They can’t compete, and they know it. For how can a real woman—with pores and her own breasts and even sexual needs of her own (let alone with speech that goes beyond “More, more, you big stud!”)—possibly compete with a cybervision of perfection, downloadable and extinguishable at will, who comes, so to speak, utterly submissive and tailored to the consumer’s least specification? For most of human history, erotic images have been reflections of, or celebrations of, or substitutes for, real naked women. For the first time in human history, the images’ power and allure have supplanted that of real naked women. Today, real naked women are just bad porn. For two decades, I have watched young women experience the continual “mission creep” of how pornography—and now Internet pornography—has lowered their sense of their own sexual value and their actual sexual value. When I came of age in the seventies, it was still pretty cool to be able to offer a young man the actual presence of a naked, willing young woman. There were more young men who wanted to be with naked women than there were naked women on the market. If there was nothing actively alarming about you, you could get a pretty enthusiastic response by just showing up. Your boyfriend may have seen Playboy, but hey, you could move, you were warm, you were real. Thirty years ago, simple lovemaking was considered erotic in the pornography that entered mainstream consciousness: When Behind the Green Door first opened, clumsy, earnest, missionary-position intercourse was still considered to be a huge turn-on. Well, I am 40, and mine is the last female generation to experience that sense of sexual confidence and security in what we had to offer. Our younger sisters had to compete with video porn in the eighties and nineties, when intercourse was not hot enough. Now you have to offer—or flirtatiously suggest—the lesbian scene, the ejaculate-in-the-face scene. Being naked is not enough; you have to be buff, be tan with no tan lines, have the surgically hoisted breasts and the Brazilian bikini wax—just like porn stars. (In my gym, the 40-year-old women have adult pubic hair; the twentysomethings have all been trimmed and styled.) Pornography is addictive; the baseline gets ratcheted up. By the new millennium, a vagina—which, by the way, used to have a pretty high “exchange value,” as Marxist economists would say—wasn’t enough; it barely registered on the thrill scale. All mainstream porn—and certainly the Internet—made routine use of all available female orifices. **************************************************** I love reading some f the comments from the readers of this article. Some being of how women for centuries use sex to manipulate men. Since 2007 | |
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| 10-31-11 01:06pm - 4801 days | #2 | |
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messmer (0)
Disabled User  Posts: 2,582 Registered: Sep 12, '07 Location: Canada |
Nothing will ever be able to compare to the feeling of holding a naked, warm, loving body in your arms. Porn has never managed to replace that in my life and I've been at it a long time. It would really be too bad if a new generation felt differently. Nothing like the real thing.  One thing mentioned in the article surprised me: that young porn users would prefer "enhanced" breasts to natural. Strange, if true. I prefer the natural non-pornstar look anyway so the girl (woman) next door is my ideal, not the glamorized version found in most sites. So, college co-eds, take heart .. there are others like me as well who will find you not only desirable but who will be willing to invest their lives in a loving future with you! | |
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| 10-31-11 01:38pm - 4801 days | #3 | |
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Capn (0)
Active User  Posts: 1,740 Registered: Sep 05, '09 Location: Near the Beer! |
I agree with your penultimate paragraph, but not the last, CT. Sure there are great swathes more hardcore available with the blossoming of the internet age, & yes, it may desensitise if you overdo it. Results of doing that could potentially go to either extreme. The sex crazed monster of the anti-porn campaigner or the jaded zombie you suggest. I feel the 'truth' lies somewhere in between. Sure, we all get jaded from time to time & look at another niche, usually harder in some form or other to take us out of our comfort zone & relieve the ennui. Another way is to lay off porn altogether for a while. For the most part, either approach services our libido by recalibrating our preferences. The libido usually sorts itself out quite quickly either way & then we can bimble along quite happily in our comfort zone again. The only time this could become a problem is when fantasy (ie the virtual world ) gets blurred with reality. No, I disagree. Women do not have to be 'perfect' as defined by the hardcore porn industry. A lot of women do have self image problems promoted avidly by a greedy cosmetic industry. A level headed woman just has to be herself & be comfortable with it. Cap'n.  Admiral of the PU Hindenburg. 2009 PU AwardHilarious Post of the Year 2010 PU Award ( I would have preferred it to be Helpful Post of the Year for Guys who Hate 'Retail Therapy' ) :0/ Sanity is in the eye of the Beholder! | |
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| 10-31-11 02:08pm - 4801 days | #4 | |
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messmer (0)
Disabled User Posts: 2,582 Registered: Sep 12, '07 Location: Canada |
Further to the subject: I read (saw on TV) only a couple of days ago that an alarming number of young men are experiencing erectile dysfunction these days because they have been de-sensitized by looking at too much porn and real life just doesn't live up to their expectations. Was the author of the study objective or was he/she promoting a cause .. ? I have no idea !?! So, asking our younger members: Has Viagra and Cialis become prematurely important in your life? Would you agree with the author of the study? | |
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| 10-31-11 02:24pm - 4801 days | #5 | |
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Cybertoad (0)
Disabled User Posts: 2,158 Registered: Jan 01, '08 Location: Wash |
I would really hate to think, porn was moving from a novelty and fantasy to influencing more to ignore reality. Perhaps the definition should be used more, that being making love. I think that describes the relationship and sharing of two consenting adults. In other words: Making love itself strangely does not have to mean sex, moreover it is the personal relationship and affection one feels for another in an intimate way. SEX Is just a prime-evil act of procreation, nothing more nothing less. Porn The realistic fantasy that is limited only for the time a real person is engaged in the environment of artificial physical intimacy. ( my definitions) There is no room for porn outside of fantasy, not if you want to have a healthy relationship with others. This same thing could be said about drugs or alcohol. Since 2007 | |
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| 10-31-11 05:29pm - 4801 days | #6 | |
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rearadmiral (0)
Active User Posts: 1,453 Registered: Jul 16, '07 Location: NB/Canada |
Not to go off half-cocked ( ) but I didn't make it past the first line. The mere mention of Andrea Dworkin means that any hope of objectivity on any aspect of male sexuality is gone. Andrea: male sexuality isn't the same as female sexuality with the addition of a penis. Get over it or fuck the fuck off. | |
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| 11-01-11 08:36am - 4800 days | #7 | |
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Cybertoad (0)
Disabled User Posts: 2,158 Registered: Jan 01, '08 Location: Wash |
I always goes full cocked myself LOL, I placed the article hoping for logical feedback from the PU group. I agree its a one sided point of view. So invited our one sides point at PU, view to ummmm view it. I think also what is ignored in this article is that there exist million of sites based on a hundred variations of the female body and to the men it attracts. What also is missing is gay porn point of view from the article? There are sites with average joes, and plump womens. Natural breast and an average body types. The gay porn sites often are just average guys, not buffed built dudes. I wish I could write an article to rebuke one sides like this as why I would hate to think people are growing up thinking porn is reality. What if the porn is showing real people, then the lines blur ? Just my thoughts on this would like to hear more from other PU's as this is a untouched area, but very interesting I thought. Or perhaps I am off base bringing it here to the forum.  Since 2007 | |
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| 11-01-11 09:56am - 4800 days | #8 | |
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pat362 (0)
Active User  Posts: 3,575 Registered: Jan 23, '07 Location: canada |
Is it the fault of porn that many young girls dress like prostitutes? Is it the fault of porn that teenage girls have no problem offering BJ (and you are lucky if it's just that) to young boys? Is it the fault of porn that mainstream TV shows and movies keep pushing the envelop when it comes to what they are willing to show on screen? There is no way that porn can be responsible for all those things. There may be many factors but I think the biggest one is parents. At some point parents chose to be or were told to be pals with their kids rather than the people who have to educate and if need be punish their child(ren). Once they gave up that obligation than they lost the abiltiy to alter the path they take in life. Now many will say that both parents now work so they can't always be there but again that is often a choice. You want the new car, you want the new TV , you want that Disney vacation, you want..you want..you want. Nowhere does it say that parents want to raise their children. No it's left to society to do that. Maybe society would be in a better place: If parents told their kids that they can't wear that oufit because they look like sluts, if parents made sure that their little boy or little girl is never left alone with someone of the opposite gender, if parents cared enough to see what TV shows, movies, music their kids listen and watch and so on. Long live the Brown Coats. | |
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