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01-23-10  03:19pm - 5447 days	Original Post - #1
Drooler (0) Disabled User Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA	No Pets Allowed! Now, don't get me wrong. I like the doggies and the kitties and the gerbils and hey, why not throw in boa constrictors and hermit crabs? But I don't think they have a place in softcore photography, (nor hardcore porn for that matter). Sure, a couple of pics of the girl holding up a cute little puttytat is no problem, but when the little animal friend is left in there to play a continual supporting role, and even worse, is seen standing on the girl's back above her protruding ass, etc., it think it wrecks the mood, and that's when I say: "No pets allowed!" I wanted something new, so I left England for New England.
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01-23-10  03:26pm - 5447 days	#2
Capn (0) Active User Posts: 1,740 Registered: Sep 05, '09 Location: Near the Beer!	It's not just pets either. Those stuffed toys irritate me too, for similar reasons. TBH, I find it a little creepy. I think on a subliminal level, it sort of infers they are still children. :0( Cap'n. :0/ Admiral of the PU Hindenburg. 2009 PU Award Hilarious Post of the Year 2010 PU Award ( I would have preferred it to be Helpful Post of the Year for Guys who Hate 'Retail Therapy' ) :0/ Sanity is in the eye of the Beholder!
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01-23-10  04:19pm - 5447 days	#3
Drooler (0) Disabled User Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA	If it were me, I just wouldn't be thinking either: 1. "Ohh, my cutest, sweetest Fido! I'm gonna get you in some photos with Anya! Lots of them!" (as at MPL) or 2. "I know what we'll do to add some variety here. Let's put the CAT in with the model! We'll have it sit on her back, stand on her head, and generally stare out in bewilderment as we take 300 shots of them together. Yes! I'm sure our subscribers will LOVE it!" I wanted something new, so I left England for New England.
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01-24-10  04:43am - 5446 days	#4
RagingBuddhist (0) Disabled User Posts: 893 Registered: Jan 23, '07	Hey - we could always go back to angel wings and picture frames. Sarcasm is a body's natural defense against stupidity.
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01-24-10  06:21am - 5446 days	#5
Drooler (0) Disabled User Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA	Originally Posted by RagingBuddhist: Hey - we could always go back to angel wings and picture frames. Hey, that's cool. Just put the wings on the dog and give it the picture frame to chew on ... off camera. I wanted something new, so I left England for New England.
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01-24-10  08:49pm - 5445 days	#6
RagingBuddhist (0) Disabled User Posts: 893 Registered: Jan 23, '07	I'm not saying I like the pets in shoots. I guess what I'm saying is that it could be a lot worse. The aforementioned angel wings and picture frames belong right up there with the obviously fake nurse uniforms - all of 'em well past being novel. Which is why I think we're seeing animals in the shoots now - they're running out of things that are fresh and cutting edge. It's a shame all sites don't have a forum like this one, where feedback is taken into consideration and acted on rather quickly if an action is warranted. That way you could petition a site to stop including _______ in their shoots. Sarcasm is a body's natural defense against stupidity.
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01-24-10  10:28pm - 5445 days	#7
exotics4me (0) Active User Posts: 664 Registered: Jan 12, '07 Location: USA	Originally Posted by RagingBuddhist: I'm not saying I like the pets in shoots. I guess what I'm saying is that it could be a lot worse. The aforementioned angel wings and picture frames belong right up there with the obviously fake nurse uniforms - all of 'em well past being novel. Which is why I think we're seeing animals in the shoots now - they're running out of things that are fresh and cutting edge. It's a shame all sites don't have a forum like this one, where feedback is taken into consideration and acted on rather quickly if an action is warranted. That way you could petition a site to stop including _______ in their shoots. I remember when females in normal clothes, stripping down to nothing and posing provocatively was cutting-edge. Maybe it will cycle back around? Drooler, haven't seen many of those animal sets. I have one of Eve from ATK premium where a little fuzzy puppy is running around at the first of it and one from FTV where a model is holding a kitten at first. Seeing as how some of our webmasters these days aren't real bright, maybe they took the request for more doggystyle poses showing the booty and kitty literally? My first time I jacked off, I thought I'd invented it. I looked down at my sloppy handful of junk and thought, This is going to make me rich. - Chuck Palahniuk
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01-24-10  10:51pm - 5445 days	#8
Capn (0) Active User Posts: 1,740 Registered: Sep 05, '09 Location: Near the Beer!	Originally Posted by exotics4me: I remember when females in normal clothes, stripping down to nothing and posing provocatively was cutting-edge. Maybe it will cycle back around? That is well overdue! I sincerely hope it returns soon! Cap'n. :0) Admiral of the PU Hindenburg. 2009 PU Award Hilarious Post of the Year 2010 PU Award ( I would have preferred it to be Helpful Post of the Year for Guys who Hate 'Retail Therapy' ) :0/ Sanity is in the eye of the Beholder!
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01-25-10  02:22am - 5445 days	#9
Drooler (0) Disabled User Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA	Originally Posted by exotics4me: I remember when females in normal clothes, stripping down to nothing and posing provocatively was cutting-edge. Maybe it will cycle back around? Drooler, haven't seen many of those animal sets. I have one of Eve from ATK premium where a little fuzzy puppy is running around at the first of it and one from FTV where a model is holding a kitten at first. Seeing as how some of our webmasters these days aren't real bright, maybe they took the request for more doggystyle poses showing the booty and kitty literally? The "animal sets" may not be growing on (or swinging from) the trees, but like the angel wings and picture frames, they keep coming back to roost on occasion. I'd finally decided to start the thread after seeing Marlene (of Hegre) at Explicite (as Anais) in one with a white poodle/terrier type in something like 60% of the shots. Why??? The photo quality was really good, and Marlene is exquisite, but in my fantasies, the dog is off in a another room, laying on its own special contour-fitting Swedish mattress, dreaming of humping other dogs. I wanted something new, so I left England for New England.
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01-25-10  08:23am - 5445 days	#10
Denner (0) Active User Posts: 1,217 Registered: Mar 03, '07 Location: Denmark	Have to agree - both about living pets and toy-ditto... At Teendreams there's a fine (old) video-clip with an Olivia - but alas - she mess about with a kitten - it seems totally out of place. The same goes for those clips with - sometimes pseudo-teens with pigtails - who has to enjoy themselves with a toy-bear or alike. "I don't drink anymore - I freeze it, and eat it like a popcicle"
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01-25-10  02:14pm - 5445 days	#11
Capn (0) Active User Posts: 1,740 Registered: Sep 05, '09 Location: Near the Beer!	Originally Posted by Denner: The same goes for those clips with - sometimes pseudo-teens with pigtails - who has to enjoy themselves with a toy-bear or alike. Exactly my meaning! Cap'n. :0) Admiral of the PU Hindenburg. 2009 PU Award Hilarious Post of the Year 2010 PU Award ( I would have preferred it to be Helpful Post of the Year for Guys who Hate 'Retail Therapy' ) :0/ Sanity is in the eye of the Beholder!
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01-25-10  05:00pm - 5445 days	#12
Wittyguy (0) Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA	x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 01:53pm
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01-25-10  08:38pm - 5444 days	#13
lk2fireone (0) Active User Posts: 3,618 Registered: Nov 14, '08 Location: CA	Originally Posted by Wittyguy: And if some jerk wad shoots a jerk wad on Ms. Fluffy or Mr. Drooler as part of a shoot then he deserves some amateur animal spaying with claws and teeth. Do you have that on tape of Mr. Drooler getting creamed? And was that consensual sex or not? Cough-choke-choke-cough. Mr. Fluffy avoids those creeps. Lol. Edited on Jan 25, 2010, 10:25pm
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01-26-10  01:25am - 5444 days	#14
Drooler (0) Disabled User Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA	Originally Posted by Wittyguy: Sounds like ze Drooler needs to come up with a new version of "Who let the Dogs Out?" for his Song Parodies thread. That should keep his mind working overtime for a few weeks ;) So, here's a quick breakdown of Wittyguy's Rules for Animals in Porn: 1. "Pornstars don't wear clothes so neither should the animals props". I have yet to see any pics or vids where some prescious porn star pulls a full on Gollum and dresses up her dixie cup sized "prescious" in some cutesy-ass heinous outfit that cost more than my wardrobe. Animals have fur and don't need clothes. If they do need clothes it's because some idiot decided to fuck with Darwin and play God through poor breeding; thus demonstrating the point professed by some religious wing nuts that God hates those he created and makes their life miserable at times just cause he thought what he created was "cute" and because he needs a cheap laugh every once in a while. 2. "I dream of Drooler" is still the worst porn movie never made. Hands down, no discussion needed. 3. "If the beast is bored, you ain't doing it right." Animals are real live animatronic interactive props. If some dog is half asleep while the feature presentation is working up a big time screaming "O" then obviously the acting needs some work. Animals are animals. OK, going beyond the obvious statement, dogs and cats have brains the size of walnuts. They know eating, they know sleeping, they know hunting/play and they know sex. That's the big four for pretty much all mammals and given how many of them there are in the world I figure they know sex pretty good. If the actors aren't convincing the beasts / experts, why are they expecting us to be convinced? When the dog is hollering in harmony with the starlet, that's entertainment ... at least it is over in the trailer park. 4. "Beastiality is a No-No". I pretty much take the view that beastiality is bad because the animal (especially if the animal is taking it) isn't really consenting to the act. Let's face it, a horse or a dog could care less about people when it comes to sex. It's pretty much only when someone decides to fire up Mr. Beasties's sex drive by manual stimulation (I'm just theorizing here people, no actual experience) that the animal is ready to go. And then what? There's nothing in it's species around so it's left taking from the bottom of the animal's sexual preference barrell. Thus, what he have here is a situation where the animal is left picking up the 300 lb hermaphrodite at last call cause that's all that's left. Friends don't let friends commit last call beer goggle atrocities. If animals are our friends (and some of them are very tasty friends when cooked I might add) then they should not actively be included in sex scenes. And if some jerk wad shoots a jerk wad on Ms. Fluffy or Mr. Drooler as part of a shoot then he deserves some amateur animal spaying with claws and teeth. 5. "The rules of filmdom say to never work with animals or children". For very good reason: 1) You never know what the fuck is going to happen (the best bits on late night tv are when the talk shows bring on the animals from the zoo and they start crapping every where) and 2) They will probably upstage you. These rules also apply to porn. 1) Fuzzy may cute perched on her ass but when Fuzzy decides that the tramp stamp or a dude's pole looks like a scratching post watch out. Forget even trying to reshoot the scene without the beastie for that day. Besides, if I recall correctly, union wages for animals in show biz are probably more than the pornstar is getting paid for the scene. 2) Let's face it, we've all seen more anonymous schlong pumping some overfed beaver more times than Michael Jackson had surgeries. What we haven't all seen is some dog taking a leak on a $3000 sofa next to a couple of fuck bunnies. Which one is really more eye catching? I rest my case. This is all I can immediately think of -- feel free to add on to the list. Thank you, Wittyguy, for saving THIS thread of mine from ... ignominy. I wanted something new, so I left England for New England.
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01-26-10  01:32am - 5444 days	#15
Drooler (0) Disabled User Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA	Originally Posted by lk2fireone: Do you have that on tape of Mr. Drooler getting creamed? And was that consensual sex or not? Cough-choke-choke-cough. Mr. Fluffy avoids those creeps. Lol. I don't believe that Wittyguy meant to turn you on like that. I wanted something new, so I left England for New England.
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