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| Porn Users Forum » "Join Now - See Girls Farting!" |
| 1-29 of 29 Posts | Page 1 |
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| 05-23-11 05:30pm - 4962 days | Original Post - #1 | |
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rearadmiral (0)
Active User Posts: 1,453 Registered: Jul 16, '07 Location: NB/Canada |
"Join Now - See Girls Farting!" That, my friends, is one of the promo tag-lines for a site called Fart Fantasy. I’m bored and am browsing through some sites over at TBP when I stumbled upon this gem. I’m not normally judgmental, but… WTF??? One the plus side, if this were your ideal site, you’d have one huge advantage that most other PUs can’t get with any other site. You could eat a big bowl of Chili and then watch the videos. When the young ladies cap off a big one you could unleash one of your own and pretend that she’s there with you. You could “see” her farting (though I’m not quite sure what that means), you could hear her farting in the video, and if you try my suggestion you could smell her farting. Hell, if your chili was particularly good you might even be able to taste her farting. I’d stay away from having the sensation of feeling her farting because that could end badly. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to watch some girl-girl milk enema videos. THOSE are completely normal. | |
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| 05-23-11 05:37pm - 4962 days | #2 | |
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rearadmiral (0)
Active User Posts: 1,453 Registered: Jul 16, '07 Location: NB/Canada |
Jesus H. Christ. Believe it or not, there is a site called Snot Girls. The tagline: "Hot Chicks Picking their Noses." Someone might be able to convince me that farting is something sexualizable (new word?). And least it's coming from an area that is normally considered sexual even if the specific act isn't. But picking boogers? | |
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| 05-23-11 06:59pm - 4961 days | #3 | |
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Drooler (0)
Disabled User  Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA |
Oh, I can see it now: Booger Patrol Babes! Fart Tarts! ETC. Aren't there enough trailer parks already? I wanted something new, so I left England for New England. | |
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| 05-23-11 11:34pm - 4961 days | #4 | |
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Capn (0)
Active User  Posts: 1,740 Registered: Sep 05, '09 Location: Near the Beer! |
They are running out of obscure angles, I think.  Cap'n.  Admiral of the PU Hindenburg. 2009 PU AwardHilarious Post of the Year 2010 PU Award ( I would have preferred it to be Helpful Post of the Year for Guys who Hate 'Retail Therapy' ) :0/ Sanity is in the eye of the Beholder! | |
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| 05-24-11 03:45am - 4961 days | #5 | |
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rearadmiral (0)
Active User Posts: 1,453 Registered: Jul 16, '07 Location: NB/Canada |
Maybe not with farting, Capn. There had to be a dozen of sites catering to that. Again, I'm not being judgmental when I wonder why something so non-sexual can be sexualized. On the plus side, I did only stumble across one booger site. | |
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| 05-24-11 04:35am - 4961 days | #6 | |
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lk2fireone (0)
Active User  Posts: 3,618 Registered: Nov 14, '08 Location: CA |
Perhaps more PU members should join that booger site, to support our fellow perverts.  x  x  | |
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| 05-24-11 06:53am - 4961 days | #7 | |
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Denner (0)
Active User  Posts: 1,217 Registered: Mar 03, '07 Location: Denmark |
Weird, just weird - some people are into watching faeces come out - I do not care, that's their pleasure - but spare me. BTW: still wonder about that "See Girls Farting" - how can you "see" that? Hear it and smell it we all know about, but...  "I don't drink anymore - I freeze it, and eat it like a popcicle" | |
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| 05-24-11 10:20am - 4961 days | #8 | |
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messmer (0)
Disabled User  Posts: 2,582 Registered: Sep 12, '07 Location: Canada |
Something far more innocuous but still puzzling. I saw a documentary the other night where people got off on popping balloons and I still can't quite grasp something fairly new: the smoking fetish. Boy, humans are complex. The older I get the less I know about what makes them tick and that goes for me too. It seems that in every single action, no matter how unrelated to sex, there is someone who will find it highly erotic. | |
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| 05-24-11 12:10pm - 4961 days | #9 | |
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graymane (0)
Suspended  Posts: 1,411 Registered: Feb 20, '10 Location: Virginia |
I figured the post a guy left on one my threads last year about belonging to a group who dine on excrement to be weird enough... too far-fetched would be an understatement. But this farting thing is giving me second thoughts about its authenticity. Farts....Think of the possibilities? The "taste and smell" features might be just around the corner, with captured farts from your favorite porn star encased in vacuum-packed bags. Could go great with your morning coffee; just pop it out the freezer, defrost, and let it blend with the aroma of your eggs and bacon. It all appears that the real, agressive smut-peddlers are digging up the absolute, most offensive, gut-wrenching presentation -- in the name of porn -- they can find . Queen Victoria must be spinning in her grave. | |
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| 05-24-11 12:56pm - 4961 days | #10 | |
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rearadmiral (0)
Active User Posts: 1,453 Registered: Jul 16, '07 Location: NB/Canada |
Funny you mention that, messmer. I noted probably a dozen balloon sites. I didn't stop to look at them because, honestly, I have no idea what they show. Girls blowing up balloons? Popping them? No idea. Maybe they fart into a balloon. | |
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| 05-24-11 12:57pm - 4961 days | #11 | |
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rearadmiral (0)
Active User Posts: 1,453 Registered: Jul 16, '07 Location: NB/Canada |
Yeah, but can I get a side of boogers with that? | |
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| 05-25-11 05:50am - 4960 days | #12 | |
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Jay G (0)
Disabled User  Posts: 96 Registered: Jan 12, '07 Location: USA |
Sounds like a real "niche" site to me. The advantage is there will not be a lot of competition. Jay G | |
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| 05-25-11 09:22am - 4960 days | #13 | |
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rearadmiral (0)
Active User Posts: 1,453 Registered: Jul 16, '07 Location: NB/Canada |
One thing I wonder about - seriously - is how difficult this is to plan. On a typical porn shoot if the girl isn't into it she can use lube and act like she is. If the guy is having trouble he can take a little blue pill and get a hard on looking at an elephant. If he's having trouble coming, turn the camera off while he wanks. It isn't like most guys don't have to finish themselves off these days anyway. But what about these farting sites? Schedule is set, lights, cameras, sound and set are ready to go. Then the girl arrives and she doesn't have gas. No one can fart on command! Not even me! (Though my wife would say otherwise.) In the old days there were fluffers for the gents. I can't imagine that there is a kind of fluffer for farting ladies. If so, that might make for an interesting segment on Dirty Jobs. | |
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| 05-25-11 10:55am - 4960 days | #14 | |
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moonbyrd (0)
Active User Posts: 17 Registered: Aug 07, '08 |
If you'd bother to read the TBP review you would find that in the reviewer's opinion most of the flatulence on the site is fake. Anyway I don't see what the big deal is. As fetishes go this one seems to be fairly innocent. Yet there are a handful of guys gathered tut-tutting and guffawing about it. Now it the girls were on the level of Monsieur Pujol (a.k.a. Le Pétomane), I might be mildly interested, although not in an erotic sense. | |
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| 05-25-11 12:36pm - 4960 days | #15 | |
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rearadmiral (0)
Active User Posts: 1,453 Registered: Jul 16, '07 Location: NB/Canada |
Lighten up, moonbyrd. We're just having a bit of fun and a laugh. Not all of us take our 'hobby' as seriously as some others. | |
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| 05-25-11 01:29pm - 4960 days | #16 | |
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graymane (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,411 Registered: Feb 20, '10 Location: Virginia |
And "fun an' laughter" it is...... Your retort: "can I get a side of boogers" had me in stitches.  | |
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| 05-25-11 05:45pm - 4960 days | #17 | |
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turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
That's the whole idea of a fetish--sexualize something that isn't ("shouldn't" in some people's minds) sexualized. Personally, the farther away you get from the genitals the harder it is for me to see the pleasure. The ass and thighs? Sure. The feet? I don't see the appeal, but apparently a lot of people do. Or, say, getting turned on by a woman's underwear (seems logical), as compared to a woman wearing glasses (whatever floats your boat). Of course if this was a car forum we'd probably all be, uh, "excited" to hear a powerful car start it's engine, so maybe farting isn't so crazy. (I've read responses by people describing car engine sounds, and many express very sexual thoughts.) "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove Edited on May 26, 2011, 11:47pm | |
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| 05-25-11 05:52pm - 4959 days | #18 | |
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turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
I assume there is some device out there that's basically a reverse pussy pump where you stick the hose in the target orifice and pump away. Fancier models probably have a pressure gauge so you can brag to your friends about being able to take a higher PSI than them...  And don't some vacuum cleaners have a blower switch? Since people are already using them to masturbate/pussy pump with, it only seems natural they would inflate themselves as well. "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove | |
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| 05-25-11 06:41pm - 4959 days | #19 | |
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messmer (0)
Disabled User Posts: 2,582 Registered: Sep 12, '07 Location: Canada |
What about eating a tin of beans shortly before a shoot? That should work! | |
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| 05-26-11 01:17am - 4959 days | #20 | |
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moonbyrd (0)
Active User Posts: 17 Registered: Aug 07, '08 |
Well, it is obvious now that I am not a good match for this board (or vice versa) as my sense of humour tends to go in different directions than that of the usual denizens. Such as contemplating the musical possibilities of such wind instruments. Perhaps they could start a band of fartists (which might have difficulties with long pieces). In fact, Wikipedia informs us that farting for entertainment has a long history, with documented examples from the Middle Ages (hence the phrase "to go medieval on someone's ass"). The idea of using a pump suggests a refinement where a visible, coloured gas is used, so that the expulsion could be witnessed visually as a plume. (The pertinent phrase would be "to blow smoke up someone's ass", although smoke might have adverse health effects.) Tangentially I am reminded also of the Kilgore Trout story of the alien with a -- from human perspective -- unusual form of communication, which caused a fatal misunderstanding. | |
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| 06-27-11 11:27am - 4927 days | #21 | |
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Micha (0)
Active User Posts: 321 Registered: Jul 04, '10 Location: san jose ca |
What about pussy farts? While in and of themselves, pussy farts may not be particularly erotic, My recollection of such events where the passings of trapped vaginal air and the resulting flutter of all the labia, and the lass's embarrassment that the event be mistaken as the release of bowel gas, which just isn't done by polite ladies ..... It is all remembered with fondness and erotic musings. I remember a short video a few years ago where a pretty lady, naked, on her back, with her knees pressed to her chest, and holding a lit candle, ignited a fart with a rather large flame resulting. Three men then raced into the scene with fire extinguishers and covered her in foam, with a voice over disclaimer that this should not be tried at home. It was not particularly erotic. But it really was a hoot! unless life also gives you water and sugar, your lemonade is gonna suck. | |
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| 06-27-11 12:13pm - 4927 days | #22 | |
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Micha (0)
Active User Posts: 321 Registered: Jul 04, '10 Location: san jose ca |
" In the course of the evening it befell that one did break wind, and thus did follow such an exceeding stench, that all were like to suffocate." This is from a monolog, allegedly written by Mark Twain, depicting a dinner hosted by Queen Elizabeth I, with a number of luminaries from that era in attendance. You can read the text, written in Olde English by googling 1601 You can hear an excellent reading of the work by searching Richard Dyer-Bennett who recorded the work in the mid sixties. The dinner is interrupted when one of the guests loudly passes gas. And the Queen sayeth “ Mine God ! In mine nine and sixty years I have not heard the fellow to that fart ! Pray, let us have the author confess. The question is directed around the table with each in attendance denying authorship….. “ Lady Ann? Why no ! For she would tickle her tiny maidenhead with many a mousy squeak, before delivering such a …..” ………had I such a beast within me, I would have spent the rest of my life to the dribbling of it forth, rather than the launching of such a thunderblast , taking mine own life with violence and rendering my frame like rotten rags.” After the farter is identified, the conversation turns to the ribald and risqué. “ ……when pricks were stiff, and cunts not loathing to take the stiffness from them “ This is worth a look unless life also gives you water and sugar, your lemonade is gonna suck. | |
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| 06-27-11 04:10pm - 4927 days | #23 | |
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messmer (0)
Disabled User Posts: 2,582 Registered: Sep 12, '07 Location: Canada |
How times have changed!  Martin Luther (in one of his Tisch Gespraeche) said to his guests after a meal:"Warum ruelpset und furzet Ihr nicht, hat es Euch nicht geschmecket?" Why are you not burping and farting, did you not enjoy the meal? Edited on Jun 27, 2011, 05:56pm | |
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| 06-27-11 04:25pm - 4927 days | #24 | |
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lk2fireone (0)
Active User Posts: 3,618 Registered: Nov 14, '08 Location: CA |
Martin Luther seems to have been an honest and forthright man. | |
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| 06-30-11 02:29pm - 4924 days | #25 | |
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manholelover (0)
Active User  Posts: 37 Registered: Jun 17, '11 Location: London, UK |
How many billions of us are on this planet? You can guarantee that there's a fetish for everyone: scratching the left eyebrow, jerking over kneecaps, wearing large hats etc etc... That's what I find wonderful about human sexuality... | |
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| 06-30-11 04:02pm - 4924 days | #26 | |
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messmer (0)
Disabled User Posts: 2,582 Registered: Sep 12, '07 Location: Canada |
A bit too honest and forthright for Rome!  | |
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| 06-30-11 04:14pm - 4924 days | #27 | |
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messmer (0)
Disabled User Posts: 2,582 Registered: Sep 12, '07 Location: Canada |
You are absolutely right. Only recently I came across a "popping of balloons" fetish, as well as a smoking fetish. Incomprehensible to those looking in but eminently rational and enjoyable to those who practice it. Vive la difference! | |
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| 07-01-11 01:02am - 4923 days | #29 | |
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WeeWillyWinky (0)
Active User  Posts: 243 Registered: Jun 03, '07 Location: Havasu City, AZ USA |
I read that story. I think it was Venus On a Half-Shell. The famous fifteenth century French author Francois Rabelais, in his book Gargantua and Pentagruel, writes a lot about farting and pooping, and seems to really dwell on scatalogical stuff. I was in tears once reading some of it aloud to my family. It's hilarious. James Joyce, in his Ulysses, has his character Molly Bloom (a paragon of feminine allure) referencing her own flatulence in the closing monologue, and I believe the poet Ezra Pound made mention of Joyce's fondness for the scatalogical. I saw an interview with Johnny Depp where he mentions his unusual interest in flatulence. And hey, if you're a woman and you're with Johnny Depp, you'll probably go ahead and crack one off for him, right?  Right? ..alright, maybe not...  You know what I hate the most about selfish people? It's that they don't think enough about MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! | |
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| 07-01-11 06:43am - 4923 days | #30 | |
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rearadmiral (0)
Active User Posts: 1,453 Registered: Jul 16, '07 Location: NB/Canada |
It looks like moonbyrd wasn't kidding when he declared he wasn't a good fit here. He hasn't posted anything in almost two months. I didn't think that a fart-joke thread would be so polarizing to some people...  And to WeeWillyWinky: I don't understand your tag line. I'm just not understanding banter at all well today. Give us it slower. | |
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