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| Porn Users Forum » You might be interested to know...........(off topic) |
| 1-9 of 9 Posts | Page 1 |
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| 10-01-10 09:56pm - 5195 days | Original Post - #1 | |
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graymane (0)
Suspended  Posts: 1,411 Registered: Feb 20, '10 Location: Virginia |
You might be interested to know...........(off topic) Driving down an isolated road last week, I began to encounter a strange feeling. Then all of a sudden there were some rotating lights emanating from a huge disc-shaped craft hovering above my car. I pulled over, after which I lost consciousness. I awakened strapped down onto a padded table, and was getting a blurred vision of some weird creatures assembled around me. About then a telepathic voice uttered sounds that I interpreted as saying: we are what you earthlings call Martians, and we're here on earth to extract cell samples from the brains of healthy sex addicts. Then I sensed another Martian interrupt: "No,Zonko, that's "pervert"...I think that's the correct term to use." Angrily, Zonko shot back: " How dare you, Axlerod, correct me in the presence of this mere, ignorant Homo sapien!" I yelled out: "wait-a-minute, who're you fat-headed wierdros calling ignorant...and watch the Homo stuff?" "And why's your head so big with those funny-looking bulging eyes...and your mouth, where the hell is your mouth?" Zonko's huge forehead immediately developed protruding blue vains (I could tell he was mad). Just then Axlerod chimed in: "now look what you�ve done, Zonko! You've gone and got our specimen all excited." "Would you shut the hell up and let me do my extraction proceedure", Zonko wailed. After some more heated exchanges the two began flailing their little arms at each other in what appeared to be a fist-fight. Immediately the two were carted out of the examining room by what I perceived as security personnel. Shortly thereafter I was addressed by somebody who looked like a senior attendant: "I'm sorry, he said, "they're interns and competitively doing this all the time." "Anyhow," he added, 'I've concluded your brain's too old and addled to serve as a cell donor, We want younger and healthier men who're really avid perverts." "But I AM a pervert," I said; and a darn avid one at that." "No, you simply won't do,' said the Senior examiner...we're sending you back. "I wanna know why I'm not an avid pervert," I blurted out...'Hell, man, I�m an active member of Porn Users for crying out loud.' "Odd you should mention that," he said...'Our research department have observed there's a limitless number of perfect specimens in that outfit, and we're going after them one-by-one." The next thing I knew I was seated behind the wheel of my car with the motor still running. I think the man means what he says, guys...I'd stay off those lonely roads if I were you.  Edited on Oct 03, 2010, 09:34am | |
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| 10-02-10 01:34am - 5195 days | #2 | |
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lk2fireone (0)
Active User  Posts: 3,618 Registered: Nov 14, '08 Location: CA |
Praise the Lord you were able to make it back safely to spread the word. I am running to my local gun store and loading up on ammo. Anyone getting within 200 yards of me better be fully human or they will be blasted into tiny pieces from my .50 caliber sniper rifle.  | |
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| 10-02-10 06:01am - 5195 days | #3 | |
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Yariana (0)
Suspended Webmaster  Posts: 56 Registered: Mar 10, '10 Location: Salem Oregon |
Are they coming after us women perverts too or just you guys! | |
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| 10-02-10 08:28am - 5195 days | #4 | |
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lk2fireone (0)
Active User Posts: 3,618 Registered: Nov 14, '08 Location: CA |
Women perverts seem to be the invisible minority. Takes a real expert to realize they even exist. Where can I find me one of them?  | |
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| 10-02-10 08:49am - 5195 days | #5 | |
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Khan (0)
Suspended  Posts: 1,737 Registered: Jan 05, '07 Location: USA |
 Sounds like a narrow escape. Thank goodness you made it back to warn the rest of us. Former PornUsers Senior Administrator Now at: MyPorn.com "To get your ideas across use small words, big ideas, and short sentences."-John Henry Patterson | |
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| 10-02-10 10:22am - 5195 days | #6 | |
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RagingBuddhist (0)
Disabled User  Posts: 893 Registered: Jan 23, '07 |
I want to know what kind of mushrooms he puts in his salads. Sarcasm is a body's natural defense against stupidity. | |
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| 10-03-10 10:41am - 5194 days | #7 | |
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graymane (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,411 Registered: Feb 20, '10 Location: Virginia |
I don't think they're interested in women, Yariana -- at least not for now. My having noticed the senior examiner's skin-tight space-suit, with no hint of a visible genitalia, I bluntly asked him if he had one. "No", he said, 'we don't reproduce like you earthlings, hence the reason why you and legions who will follow are going to give up some of their body-parts to help us obtain them." I don't have time to explain the complicated process, he said, 'but I will tell you we're absent the lust, libidinous passion, and orgasmic pleasure you earthling's enjoy." "Why just us Web- perverts? I inquired, 'Hell, earth's full of other guys equipped just like us." "But we think the Web-perverts are having more fun WITH that equipment..... need I say more?"  | |
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| 10-03-10 11:11am - 5194 days | #8 | |
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graymane (0)
Suspended Posts: 1,411 Registered: Feb 20, '10 Location: Virginia |
Just the plain 'ol variety that pops up in abundance after some rain showers. They're all over my back yard. I'll be happy to ship you some, RB....just say the word. | |
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| 10-03-10 01:13pm - 5194 days | #9 | |
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Monahan (0)
Active User  Posts: 348 Registered: Jan 17, '07 Location: SF Valley, CA |
Sexist, chauvinistic PIGS!  | |
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