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Porn Users Forum » You're Government Hard At Work (At Least For Americans)
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04-27-10  11:39pm - 5353 days Original Post - #1
turboshaft (0)
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Posts: 1,958
Registered: Apr 01, '08
You're Government Hard At Work (At Least For Americans)

I'm sure some American PUers have already heard about this story, but apparently some of the employees at the SEC (Securities and Exchanges Commission), which is a part of the U.S. government that's supposed to watch Wall Street, were spending a lot of time downloading porn. Like up to eight hours a day--sounds like badandy numbers to me --and in some cases even burning to DVD and CD after they filled up hard drives!

This story was first reported by the Washington Times back in February, but since they are a conservative newspaper owned by a church it sounded way too good of a story to be true coming from them--"The evil of porn and the failure of government regulation?! Yes! We were right all along!"--but apparently they were telling the truth.

Now I am all for government regulation of the free market--especially for the assholes running/ruining Wall Street--but I don't think you can be very good at your job if you're downloading porn for eight hours of the work day, even if you're a site reviewer (because you're eventually going to have to stop downloading and write a review). This story does make me laugh though and even makes me rethink my earlier claims of swearing off all government related jobs for life. Though knowing my luck they would probably make me sign a 'no-porn' contract or something...bastards.

This story sounds like every sexophobic conservative's wet dream but it would probably help things at least a little if the SEC employees kept their collection building hobbies at home. "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove

04-28-10  12:36pm - 5352 days #2
Wittyguy (0)
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Posts: 1,138
Registered: Feb 04, '08
Location: Left Coast, USA
There was actually a news article today saying that no one would be fired for their porn escapades. Frankly, the people at the SEC aren't doing anything different than lots of other people do at work. A great clip I saw a while back was some market guru reporting from a company bull pen while some trader had some porn rolling on his monitor in the background. Conservatives always get up in arms about this stuff because it's "government wasting tax payer money" etc., etc. Frankly, if they aren't watching porn then they'd probably be watching You Tube or playing solitaire.

If you have time to spend on porn at work then the boss probably won't be happy since you're not working. The secondary consideration is that the person watching porn at work is moron who doesn't realize that a company of any size tracks web use and site destinations of it's employees (do you want a moron working for you). Third, you then have the whole hostile environment / sexual harassment thing that can cost big $$ if someone takes offense at the moron running porn on his work station. Any smart person would realize that's what the ipad was invented for ... frequent trips to the bathroom with your personal porn pad (would that be a p-pad ... maybe when Steve Jobs finally figures out that flash media would be a good app to adopt).

04-28-10  01:37pm - 5352 days #3
bootsulike (0)
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Posts: 10
Registered: Oct 05, '08
Location: uk
We had a local govt employee here caught d/l porn at work. He was the chief officer of the crematorium!

[insert dead end job joke here]

04-28-10  03:14pm - 5352 days #4
turboshaft (0)
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Posts: 1,958
Registered: Apr 01, '08
Wittyguy, in regards to the sexual harassment, I'm not really sure it would be a huge problem since it mentioned one employee had hundreds of pictures on her computer--so clearly it's just not bored male bureaucrats. And maybe if they were only downloading from American porn sites you could argue they were not wasting money, just using it to stimulate the economy the old fashioned way. You know, I've always wondered how many stimulus checks from the last few years have gone to buy porn... "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove Edited on Apr 29, 2010, 05:13pm

04-29-10  02:21pm - 5351 days #5
badandy400 (0)
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Posts: 869
Registered: Mar 02, '08
Location: ohio
Paid to sit at work and is every one of our dreams. They should just say they were checking them for illegal content. "For example, badandy400 has taken it upon himself to become the one man Library of Congress for porn with a collection that surely will be in Guinness Book of World Records some day." ~Toadsith~

PU Interview

04-29-10  03:44pm - 5351 days #6
Drooler (0)
Disabled User



Posts: 1,831
Registered: Mar 11, '07
Location: USA
Originally Posted by badandy400:


Paid to sit at work and is every one of our dreams. They should just say they were checking them for illegal content.


Not my dream. Never would be. I'd be ashamed to have a job where I just clocked in and got paid for sitting on my ass. I wanted something new, so I left England for New England.

04-29-10  03:49pm - 5351 days #7
Wittyguy (0)
Active User



Posts: 1,138
Registered: Feb 04, '08
Location: Left Coast, USA
Originally Posted by turboshaft:


Wittyguy, in regards to the sexual harassment, I'm not really sure it would be a huge problem since it mentioned one employee had hundreds of pictures on her computer--so clearly it's just not bored male bureaucrats. And maybe if they were only downloading from American porn sites you could argue they were not wasting money, just using it to stimulate the economy the old fashioned way. You know, I've always wondered how many stimulus checks from the last few years have gone to bury porn...


Cool, a federal female employee feeding the slot machine on the taxpayer dime (or has inflation made that a quarter now). Actually, same sex sexual harassment is a big issue that employer's don't think about or address so much. The laws are such that it doesn't matter what sex the offender is, it's mostly how their conduct reasonably comes across (lots of companies get sued because a bunch of dudes suddenly decide to call some schmuck "gay" and ride him, figuratively in most cases, all the time about it).

As for the stimulus checks, I can't say that I've heard of too many people using them to "bury" porn ... sounds like something the conservative nutjobs might do or those survivalists who need to preserve their stash against the fascist/socialist black UN helicopters who are coming to take our credit cards and preforeclosure homes away.

04-29-10  05:21pm - 5351 days #8
turboshaft (0)
Active User

Posts: 1,958
Registered: Apr 01, '08
Originally Posted by Wittyguy:


As for the stimulus checks, I can't say that I've heard of too many people using them to "bury" porn ... sounds like something the conservative nutjobs might do or those survivalists who need to preserve their stash against the fascist/socialist black UN helicopters who are coming to take our credit cards and preforeclosure homes away.


Lol. I meant to say "buy" (though the porn could have been mostly from free sites), as "burying" the porn would probably have prevented most of the bad but hilarious press. But I do believe the conservative hypocrites are the ones who usually bury their stash, at least until they are accused of buying and doing meth in some cheap motel with a male prostitute. I am sure plenty of porn haters have some decent collections that are just waiting to be unearthed once their 'moral' crusades come crashing back down to earth... "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove

04-30-10  01:29pm - 5350 days #9
Wittyguy (0)
Active User



Posts: 1,138
Registered: Feb 04, '08
Location: Left Coast, USA
While we're on the subject of "government hard at work" (does that mean it's OK to pop a few Viagra before going to the office?), here's an even better one from the fine folks in Arizona.

For those outside the US, Arizona has decided that it's time to emulate Nazi Germany by requiring every immigrant to carry their "papers" at all times and requires police to request verification of a persons immigration when they have reasonable suspicion that they are not citizens (aka - you have brown skin). Not content enough with this, Arizona (aka - "Democracy's Meth Lab" is now going to ban teachers with thick accents from the class room. Of course, in order to comply with No Child Left Behind federal rules, Arizona hired a bunch of hispanic speaking teachers several years ago to work with kids for whom English was a second language. I can't wait to see the lawsuits over this one.

Now, the governor is about to sign a new law that will cause any state school to lose its funding if teaches a course that "promote the overthrow of the U.S. government, promote resentment of a particular race or class of people, are designed primarily for students of a particular ethnic group or advocate ethnic solidarity instead of the treatment of pupils as individuals." Say goodbye to any ethnic studies classes, political theory classes that discuss communism, or perhaps even some kinds of foreign language classes.

Now that's your government hard at work.

05-03-10  02:57pm - 5347 days #10
turboshaft (0)
Active User

Posts: 1,958
Registered: Apr 01, '08
Originally Posted by Wittyguy:


Now that's your government hard at work.


It's interesting how those who thought up and passed this bill, and now support it with classic xenophobic zeal, are the same assholes who screech and scream for 'smaller government'. I guess 'smaller' refers to the government's tolerance for basic civil rights. Of course they claim it's a matter of national security. Hmm, where have I heard that before? It's sounds familiar...

Yes, immigration is a huge problem, particularly for border states like Arizona, but fences and walls and profiling and teabagging rallies are not the solution (particularly the last one which sounds kind of ). The government--a small one, of course -- has to go after that wonderful entity we call the free market. The businesses that fuel the main motive for illegal entry into the country by continuing to hire and pay undocumented employees, in essence funding illegal immigration. The problem here of course is the lure of dirt cheap labor for businesses because if an employee isn't documented then the employer doesn't have to pay them minimum wage.

But that's probably too much thinking for politicians with national security complexes. "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove

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