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Porn Users Forum » Rules for Anal Sex in Porn |
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08-26-09 05:31pm - 5597 days | Original Post - #1 | |
Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Rules for Anal Sex in Porn x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 11:41am | |
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08-26-09 06:51pm - 5597 days | #2 | |
pat362 (0)
Active User Posts: 3,575 Registered: Jan 23, '07 Location: canada |
Nice list Witty. I'm a huge fan of anal. I've got tons of movies that contain that particular act, but the ones that I enjoy the most are those with a story line attached to it. I partially disagree with #1 because the jaw can only open so big due to our design. The anus can stretch quite a bit and still return to normal. Usually a girl has to be extreme to try to use a bat as a sex toy. If the girl is into it then it can be great. If it's just a circus act then it's gross and limp inducing. Agree 200% with #2. I'd just add that there is nothing worse than a girls stating that this is her first anal but she gapes like a grapefruit. Why pretend about it. I'd rather see a girl enjoying it then one who's cringing every time the guy moves hald an inch. I'll gadly volunteer for #3. I'll even do it for free. There is something about 2 guys not having a problem with their dicks rubbing against each other in a very small area. I guess that's why they are pornstars. I'm affraid that number 5 is a possibility with this particular sex act. It is fairly uncommon and I know that there is a fetish about it. It's just not one of mine. Thank God for editing. I agree 1000% with #6. No more ATM, ATOGM and certainly no eating or playing with fecal matter in any form. Long live the Brown Coats. | |
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08-26-09 11:26pm - 5597 days | #3 | |
turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
Man, what is it with Wittyguy and his lists? Funny and informative... :) My own thoughts: Rule 1: If it's too big your mouth, it's too big for your ass. I'm going to have to agree with pat362 here. The mouth and the anus are not the same, minus the violations of your Rule #6, when they apparently are treated as such. If a whole site or video is dedicated to so-big-it-hurts anal play then, yes, it is going overboard and it's not too sexy, but if the occasional girl likes it -- maybe even loves it (I hope) -- then it is okay. That's what makes those girls so special. ;) Rule 2: Act like you mean it; like the phrase "I took it in the ass". I agree, and this sort of goes back to my thoughts on Rule #1: if said performer prefers, loves, or is otherwise qualified in, said acts -- and can assiduously demonstrate so in photographic or video shoot performances -- then said acts shall be executed in full. Rule 3: More women in real life need to appreciate anal sex. Yes! I will also volunteer my services here. (Hey, where are you going? I only want the best education for your daughter!) You should run for public office on this platform; it might make me actually believe in education for once. Imagine if someone like Seymore Butts was a school's dean...and you thought college admissions was competitive now. Rule 4: Scenes involving "double anal" is just gay sex. This is probably why I'm not in porn. Nah, if I liked the girl I would just cave and volunteer my services as I did above. (Could two dongs make a right here?) Plus I have seen videos where two guys in one girl's mouth did not violate your Rule #1, so they could have tried for double anal. Rule 5: Beware of the stalactites, stalagmites, sleestaks and other cave dwellers. Can this be a rule for any sex in porn or real life? This is really more of a problem for me when I see pictures -- having a photographic memory can be a serious curse... I understand and sympathize that a clean colon can be hard to come by (or in; see Rule #6), but you would think the one thing a performer would be anal about would be preparing for an anal scene. Oh the humanity! Rule 6: Just cause dogs eat their own poo doesn't mean you should too. If a girl is in violation of Rule #5, then I say just declare the milkshake machine out of order for the rest of the day, or at least don't drink out of the damn thing -- you can pour and serve all you want, just no consumption afterward. If not in violation of Rule #5, refer to Rule #1 and Rule #2. If done occasionally, with great care and preparation, and the girl actually likes it (I know, I know, I am asking a lot here, but I would not want to force this on or in a girl), then I give the green light. And if the girl doesn't want to taste test her tailpipe, please don't fucking make her. This is one of those times that a performer's hesitation should not be taken lightly. When whole videos and sites are dedicated to one crazy act with just a different girl each scene, then you get less a sensual and entertaining atmosphere, and more a Girls Gone Wild idiot extravaganza where exploitation and one-upmanship (upwomanship?) are the rule. "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove Edited on Aug 26, 2009, 11:31pm | |
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08-26-09 11:28pm - 5597 days | #4 | |
badandy400 (0)
Active User Posts: 869 Registered: Mar 02, '08 Location: ohio |
I can not do poop porn! The idea of people eating poop is so repulsive and I like just about anything. In the very few clips, not scenes, I have seen I can almost smell the shit from my computer. Anal it self is fine, although I usually will not go out of my way for it. 1. If it is too big for her mouth it has got to go somewhere. I do not mind overly large anal toys and such. However, a tight ass is much better. 2. I agree that she can not just lay there and take it. There needs to be more too it. 3. I am researching a location for myself to start up that exact schooling. I will not even charge tuition, but special treatment can be expected from those girls who bring me a can of Spaghettios. 4. Yup, pretty gay. Double anal cream pie, even gayer. Most of use guys will agree that the sensitive part of our penis is on the bottom side. So, when these guys do double anal they are actually getting most of their pleasure from rubbing dicks with the other guy. Just when you thought it was gay it got even gayer! 5. Clean is an absolute must. Cheating XXX Wife is a prime example of anal play with out precleaning. Many scenes end up with poop on things when she does anal. Nothing takes the eroticism out of anal dildoing like seeing a huge chunk of poop on the dildo when it comes out. When you let someone barrow something you expect it back in the same condition, so my dick or dildo should also come back in the same condition it when in. 6. Poop eating is just wrong. I know people want to be Earth friendly and recycle but there are limits. You are not making people starve in other countries if you are selfish and throw away your poop. Poop help farmers grow food, but poop is not food. I do not have an issue with AssSmoothie and their idea, but I have seen a video of theirs where I could see a little poop chunk in the glass while she drank the whole thing. The only way poop should be involved with porn is when I am reading the Hustler cartoons while on the can. Unfortunately you missed one rule. 7. There should be no farting during or after an anal scene. I know this can not be helped at times, but it really does need to be edited out. I understand we are asking these women to be slutty, but it is nice for them to maintain some ladiness. "For example, badandy400 has taken it upon himself to become the one man Library of Congress for porn with a collection that surely will be in Guinness Book of World Records some day." ~Toadsith~ PU Interview | |
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08-26-09 11:42pm - 5597 days | #5 | ||
turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
Yes, a very good rule, even though it makes me laugh, but that is usually not what I am watching porn for. I guess this is when you can actually appreciate a good score or soundtrack. Oh, and don't have the performers try and pass it off as a queef. ---------- A little clarity on my part. When I said
I only meant the creampie, smoothie, and other externally sourced fluids scenes, not actual shit scenes -- which I don't consider anal anyway. So, AssSmoothie is okay, given the other rules not being violated. 2Girls1Cup, or any number of people and any cup or receptacle, is not okay. "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove | ||
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08-27-09 01:48pm - 5596 days | #6 | |
ErosGuy (0)
Suspended Posts: 1 Registered: Jul 27, '08 Location: West Palm Beach FL |
All Anal Porn should end with a CREAMPIE! The ones I see now are so HOT! I've already found a few really good ones! Butt Admirer West Palm Beach FL | |
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08-27-09 02:30pm - 5596 days | #7 | |
Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 11:41am | |
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08-27-09 03:02pm - 5596 days | #8 | |
Drooler (0)
Disabled User Posts: 1,831 Registered: Mar 11, '07 Location: USA |
I don't think anal sex porn was ever necessary -- except for the gay folk -- but I have seen a few scenes of women taking it up the poop chute which really got my bells chiming. (Or was that the dog tags?) What they have in common is that the girl seems really excited about it and the camera work glorifies her lovely ass. Like there's this one I have of Rebecca Linares on a gurney in a "doctor's office." It's too much!! But eating shit doesn't have a damn thing to do with sex. It's just zero-star -- make that sub-zero-star -- dining. And yes, the girl should make sure that the Klingons have cleared the cavern before the Enterprise boldly goes where just how many men have gone before. I wanted something new, so I left England for New England. | |
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08-27-09 04:13pm - 5596 days | #9 | |
turboshaft (0)
Active User Posts: 1,958 Registered: Apr 01, '08 |
Does this mean we have to call you Dr. Wittyguy from now on? :) "It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore Commie works." - Gen. Jack D. Rippper, Dr. Stranglove | |
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08-27-09 07:55pm - 5596 days | #10 | |
badandy400 (0)
Active User Posts: 869 Registered: Mar 02, '08 Location: ohio |
Ouch, I got slapped by the big font! If the scene ends in a cream pie they usually like to have it come out. Does that constitute pooping? Is it edible? I have seen girls eat it that way before. "For example, badandy400 has taken it upon himself to become the one man Library of Congress for porn with a collection that surely will be in Guinness Book of World Records some day." ~Toadsith~ PU Interview | |
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09-03-09 05:36am - 5589 days | #11 | |
Pornbro (0)
Active User Posts: 10 Registered: Sep 03, '09 Location: Miami |
nice topic, but about rule# 7 I got a mean question. I don't know people with this affectation, so how can someone like it to eat shit or like to see other doing something like that. The only fetish I have seen that I really can't understand why. Ok Penis insertion isn't really cool, but I can understand that someone could like it. Maybe someone got a answer for me :) Anyway nice rules, agree to them 100%. When the bowel is outside the body it was to much analsex I think | |
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09-06-09 05:44am - 5586 days | #12 | |
Capn (0)
Active User Posts: 1,740 Registered: Sep 05, '09 Location: Near the Beer! |
Those rules seem pretty sensible to me. Rule 1 for instance. I do think that the ladies should check for size before commiting to anal. It is a fair bet if it won't fit the mouth or you gag on it you are probably going to have problems. ;) Cap'n :) Admiral of the PU Hindenburg. 2009 PU Award Hilarious Post of the Year 2010 PU Award ( I would have preferred it to be Helpful Post of the Year for Guys who Hate 'Retail Therapy' ) :0/ Sanity is in the eye of the Beholder! | |
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