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| Porn Users Forum » User Ranks » User Post History |
Post History:
Wittyguy (0)
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| 901-950 of 1139 Posts | < Previous Page | 1 | 2 | 5 | 8 | 11 | 18 | Page 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | Next Page > |
| 12-11-08 12:19pm - 5855 days | #21 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User  Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
On my continuing quest to expose government interference with our porn collections, Australia has now taken an early lead. In an attempt to keep up with the Chinese and Middle Eastern countries, the Aussie's are now rolling out their new government "cybersafety plan" which is an internet filter they hope to impose on all ISP's doing business in Australia. The government spokesperson claims that "there is nothing sacrosanct" about the internet and likens peoples concerns about people trying to evade the law by claiming that like speeding laws, you need to have those laws even if people don't always follow them. Apparently they are about to start running trials with several programs and that depending on the type of filter internet downloads will be slowed from 2% to about 75%. The idea is to stop child porn (even though the filter will not cover "peer to peer" connections or file sharing networks where most of the nasty stuff is found) and other bad sites that are kept in a secret government registry. Obviously, if the filtering becomes mandatory the list of banned sites will probably grow exponentially. I have no problem with keeping kids from porn sites and stopping the trafficking of child porn but there has to be some level of personal responsibility. Apparently the Aussie government has decided that risk is too great to allow people to set up filters or monitor their kids on-line activities without government intervention. Here's a link to the full article on the subject: http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/12/techno...nternet/12cyber.html. | |
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| 12-09-08 05:18pm - 5857 days | #5 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Nothing new under the sun here. Part of I think to has to do with licensing. Some of the sets that maybe "exclusive" to a site may only have a limited "exclusive lifetime". After a time, the photographer/owner has the right to resell. Part of it also is, as others have noted, sites trading or cross selling to boost their content numbers at a discount. Personally, I don't have a big problem with it as I might catch something from another site I haven't joined or the quality might be better from the other site. | |
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| 12-08-08 01:25pm - 5858 days | #19 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Wait Squirrel! You forgot to add homosexuality to your list. I only bring this up becasue my favorite group of fringe "Christian" (I use the word loosely) conservative wack jobs is on the loose again: the Westboro Baptist Church ("WBC") of Kansas. They were recently spotted in Oregon protesting the election of a small town mayor who is a transvestite (news flash: small farming/logging town actually votes on the issues). I loved the picture I saw of the 16 year old girl holding the signs "Obama = Antichrist" and "God Hates You" (apparently her home school GED final only covered slogans and sign painting). It was good to see the WBC outnumbered by counter-protestors by a ratio of, ohhh, 50:1. The WBC is a real piece of work. Their take on the world (aka: "America" ... I guess the Bible talking about Israel as the choosen land was simply a misprint) is that our country is in deep doo-doo because we are too tolerant of homosexuals. Any one who supports anything resembling a homo agenda is going to hell. They take their message across the country via small protests, most notably protesting at military funerals of soldiers killed in Iraq and Afghanistan (America woudl not be at war and the soldiers would not have died if the US had just taken a tougher stand against gays). They have a wonderful website (www.godhatesfags.com) where you can learn all about your sins. In a further display of their deep intellectualism, they have their website copyrighted with the following phrase: "You may use any of our material free of charge for any reason". In case you do not live in the blessed kingdom of America, you can go to www.godhatestheworld.com and learn why your nation is also damned forever. I bring all this up subject (mostly referring to the WBC's hatred of Democrats) to point out that politicians not only want controversey, that they exploit it as a means for advancing their own agendas. In the excellent book "Whats the Matter with Kansas", the author laid out the example of how the Republican party was able to use the culture wars to tap into low income America while delivering virutally nothing legislatively to their base. In fact, many Republican policies (aka- tax cuts for the rich, deregulation and free trade) actually economically harm much of their core base. I guess my point is that for the masses not affiliated with PU, the "porn wars" are more about defining a position to be exploited in an election than about defending the Bill of Rights. Perhaps we should all climb aboard Toadsith's PU Zepellin of Porn Love (the "Airplane" sequal that was never made) and spread the word, knowing that we're all just poster children anyways for someone's next campaign. Edited on Dec 08, 2008, 01:36pm | |
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| 12-07-08 03:11pm - 5859 days | #17 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Yes, I know everyone is sick of the Miller test but it's going to rear it's head again in court in either a very ugly way or a very good way for U.S. pervs by early 2009. The 'Evil Angel' criminal obscenity case recently had pre-trial arguments regarding how Miller relates to internet porn (see the first post in this thread). Judging by the caliber of attorneys and arguments, regardless of how the trial judge rules on this matter it is probably headed for the Supreme Court for ulitmate clarification. I wanted to flush out some nuances from the arguments because I think it's important for consumers to understand how this case might impact what they can see in the future and see how the feds, at least the Bush era feds, perceive porn on the net. First up concerns the issue of what constitutes the "work, as a whole" idea. Evil Angel ("EA") is being prosecuted in part because they displayed a 4 minute "obscene" video trailer on their site preview. The government says you only need to consider the trailer, not the whole website. EA says you have to look at the whole website other wise it's like saying the academy awards are handed out on the basis of movie trailers alone. If the government prevails this could have a proverbial "chilling effect" on even mainstream porn sites, causing them to shy away from any scenes that might "edgy". Another chilling effect position taken by the gov. is this: like the woman who was prosecuted in Penn. for writing "obscene" child porn fantasy stories, the gov. takes the position that EA couldn't give a written description of the movie without violating obscenity standards unless the description was so watered down as not really describe anything. If that's true, good-bye blogosphere and good-bye PU. Second, there is the whole "community standards" test. This issue has been discussed a lot here and in courts with the government taking the position it only means the jurisdiction where the trial court is situated while the producers say it should include the whole country because of the internet's breadth. EA correctly pointed out that the courts have never limited "community" to a single jurisdiction. In this case, the gov. took the audacious position that producers should just put softcore on the net. This is a stupid position considering that unless you know what the "community" is, even softcore could be deemed obscene is some jurisdictions so there is still no resolution to the problem, forgetting even to try and determine what "softcore" really means. Lastly, there is whole issue of how "substantive due process" affects one's "zone of privacy". Most of us are familiar with procedural due process (Miranda rights, right to a jury trial, right to an attorney in criminal cases, no ex post facto laws, etc. -- rules that define how to "play the game" when it comes to gov. trying to impact our liberties). Substantive due process concerns an individual's rights to exercise their constitutional liberties in a manner free from excessive gov. interference. The "zone of privacy" is court created right where individuals have the right to be free from excessive government intrusion in their home or private personal surroundings. In the EA case, the gov. went to a public cybercafe to look at the EA website. The gov. claims that this is public display and therefore EA has no defense of privacy in that their consumers view this stuff in their own homes. EA takes the position that the internet is not a brick and mortar store or has a physical presence in the world; that just because the internet can be publicly accessed doesn't mean that you lose any protections when you move the viewing into your home. EA says that it's like being stuck on a plane with the guy next to view viewing offensive material on his lap top -- you don't prosecute the publisher of the material, you tell the guy to take it some where private. This substanstive due process issue gets more complex because in other more recent cases the courts have moved away from the idea that just because something is obscene that doesn't mean it's automatically illegal if it happens in a person's home or privacy zone (the Supreme Ct. used this idea in striking down Georgia's law against homosexual sodomy by saying what people do in consent behind close doors isn't the government's business). EA argues that even if their material is deemed obscene that it doesn't mean they have to be shut down because they intend that consumers only view their stuff in privacy and that if the consumer takes it's public it's the consumer's problem, not theirs. EA also notes that if producers want to copyright their materials (obviously a must in the web world and done by filing out gov. issued forms and sending a copy of your "work" to DC), in a sense that means making it public by filing it with the feds so that means producers could be on the hook for just trying to conduct ordinary business activities. The substantive due process argument is an interesting take in my book, arguing that distributing obscene material is not a crime because people have the right to use obscene material so long as it's intended for private use only. If the courts take EA's position, then pretty much obscenity dies out and an everything goes (so long as it's consentual and not involving minors or beasties) attitude will take effect. Or, the courts could ultimately ditch the Miller test and give us a new can of worms to play with. Even if the court keeps the Miller test but expands "community" to the whole US, it's going to make porn obscenity cases mostly disappear. So, there you have it sport's fans ... a first amendment porn primer for you to chew on. Given that this case is sure to go up, up, up and (maybe) away on appeal it ensure's this threads existence for a long time to come and making you wince at the thought of reading more about this stuff ;) Edited on Dec 07, 2008, 03:27pm | |
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| 12-07-08 01:55pm - 5859 days | #64 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 11:17am | |
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| 12-07-08 01:26pm - 5859 days | #10 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:14pm | |
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| 12-06-08 12:23pm - 5860 days | #21 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:15pm | |
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| 12-05-08 04:35pm - 5861 days | #15 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:12pm | |
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| 12-05-08 04:33pm - 5861 days | #37 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
This is an issue touched upon in the "What should a PU review contain" thread. In my book there are only two ways of minimizing the subjectiveness of scoring (it will never be, nor should be, entirely eliminated). First, is experience. Only after having been a member at a bunch of sites, reading a lot of reviews and posting some of your own will you start getting consistent. Some reviews I did early on here will be getting rescored soon because I was judging too much on own personal likes as opposed to trying to give a more balanced analysis for the masses. Second, is the technical side of scoring. I try to include a lot of more technical stuff (sizes, downloads, quality of content (is it professionally done), site navigation and layout, etc.) because that is part of the overall experience. Sites that have high technical merit in my book will score higher even if I'm not so big on the content. I think you'll also find the top sites on PU also score high in technical merit ... think of it like figure skating, while the free style portion (actual action) is great, you can't win the gold unless you're technically sound in the early round(s). | |
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| 12-05-08 04:25pm - 5861 days | #6 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Yeah, the address is for credit card verification purposes. I can't imagine a company sending actual "snail mail" porn spam to your mail box. Way to expensive for the margins these sites operate at and way too risky in terms of having uptight DA some where start pursuing them for violating obscenity laws. | |
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| 12-05-08 04:22pm - 5861 days | #5 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:16pm | |
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| 12-04-08 07:07pm - 5862 days | #46 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:13pm | |
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| 12-04-08 12:46pm - 5862 days | #38 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:13pm | |
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| 12-04-08 12:28pm - 5862 days | #16 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:11pm | |
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| 12-04-08 12:27pm - 5862 days | #13 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:11pm | |
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| 12-03-08 04:41pm - 5863 days | #10 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:11pm | |
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| 12-03-08 04:06pm - 5863 days | #91 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 11:23am | |
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| 12-03-08 02:55pm - 5863 days | #88 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 11:23am | |
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| 12-03-08 02:14pm - 5863 days | #86 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 11:22am | |
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| 12-03-08 01:51pm - 5863 days | #84 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 11:22am | |
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| 12-03-08 01:23pm - 5863 days | #82 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 11:22am | |
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| 12-03-08 01:08pm - 5863 days | #5 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Mmmmmmm. Do I detect the stench of a 2009 PUey Award emanating from this post? Edited on Dec 03, 2008, 01:49pm | |
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| 12-03-08 01:05pm - 5863 days | #22 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 01:52pm | |
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| 12-03-08 01:01pm - 5863 days | #5 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:10pm | |
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| 12-03-08 12:52pm - 5863 days | #16 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:15pm | |
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| 12-03-08 12:43pm - 5863 days | #2 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Great ditty cybertoad. There are definitely some holiday tunes that can "porn-o-ized". A friend and I had some lyrics made up to the Yukon Cornelius (character from the old claymation holiday favorite "Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer") song 'Silver and Gold' only our version was entitled 'Bitches and Hoes'. Bitches and Hoes, Bitches and Hoes Everyone wishes for Bitches and Hoes How do you measure the pleasure their worth? Just by the pleasure it gives Johns' on earth! Bitches and Hoes, Bitches and Hoes Mean so much more when I see Silver and Gold G strings on ev'ry sweet piece of meat (if you want so sing along with the enhanced lyrics, go here: http://www.christmas-songs.org/songs/silver_and_gold.html ). | |
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| 12-02-08 07:40pm - 5864 days | #27 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:13pm | |
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| 12-02-08 06:45pm - 5864 days | Original Post - #1 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:10pm | |
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| 12-02-08 04:16pm - 5864 days | #24 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:12pm | |
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| 12-02-08 04:06pm - 5864 days | #29 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:48pm | |
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| 12-02-08 03:08pm - 5864 days | #27 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:48pm | |
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| 12-02-08 01:57pm - 5864 days | #19 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 01:52pm | |
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| 12-02-08 01:51pm - 5864 days | #14 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:12pm | |
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| 12-02-08 11:43am - 5864 days | #15 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 01:52pm | |
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| 12-02-08 11:37am - 5864 days | #13 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 01:51pm | |
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| 12-02-08 11:11am - 5864 days | #9 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:14pm | |
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| 12-02-08 11:07am - 5864 days | #11 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 01:51pm | |
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| 12-01-08 10:35pm - 5864 days | #3 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
To close out the evening (you can change back into your porn viewing attire now) I'm including a series of quips, witticisms, one liners and just plain amusing posts from the forum this year in no particular order. And remember, post early and post often and be afraid, be very afraid, of the 2009 Forum Award Puey's .... ....... Drooler (11-26: "Your Avatar" thread): "For a good brawl, go to You-Tube. For edification, choose Porn Users." BadAndy400 (11-13: "Organizing the Video Collection" thread): "But when porn is outlawed I will be sitting pretty for a long time ... unless of course those bastards come and take my [porn] stash because my name is all over the internet porn world". (Reply from Toadisth on 11-13): "That's why you need to invest in the Advanced Hard Drive Protection System. Also, more commonly known as the Benelli M4 Super 90 Semi-Automatic Shotgun." Wittyguy (6-13 "Sites You Wish Were Still Around" thread) (responding to a post about braless English girls): "Just don't look at their teeth." (6-13 reply from Monahan): "Really? My gaze never made it up that high". BadAndy400 (10-1: "Careless Reviews and Reading Cost Us All" thread): "Facts are facts and opinions are like assholes." Drooler (9-16: "I've Been Unfaithful" thread): (responding to someone finding a porn review site that actually diss'ed a website they reviewed) "It's like discovering a new planet in the solar system. Switching now to PBS: 'The planet Messmer was discovered ... radio waves emanating from it reveal an honest distaste for 'Granny Porn'." Pat362 (8-8: "Hat's off to Khan" thread): "KHAN .. KHAN .. KHAN. This concludes my William Shatner impersonation." JBDick (4-9: "Report Bugs Here" thread): (responding to Rick's thread regarding any problems with the PU website) "Like the Carlsberg Beer Complaints Dept., it looks like it's never been used." Drooler (10-6: "Now we'll see how addicted we are" thread): "It's a lot better to go through times of dope but no money than to go through times of money but no dope." Toadsith (9-15: "Mazda RX 8 or Puegot 307" thread): "One doesn't go out for a night of fine dining with German cuisine and one does not go out for a sturdy, reliable car made in France." (9-19: same thread, in response to someone selling a Lotus and trading it in for Lamborghini because of engine problems) "Isn't that like saying a Jalapeno pepper is too hot so I'll eat this Habanero pepper instead?" Wittyguy (6-13: "Big Brother Comes Knocking the UK" thread) (responding to question about what the Statue of Liberty's tablet says): "Currently, the tablet has a list of Dick Cheney's enemies on it (carvers work around the clock adding names to it)." Pat362 (9-2: "Reviews and the age gap" thread): "I'm not expecting a giant afro bush, but must all female performers be without pubic hair today." (reply from Drooler on 9-3): "Some low nap carpeting is fine by me." JBDick (5-19: "Easter Europeans taking over" thread): "I've just had a lengthy chat with someone who knows all about European Models/Pornstars ... my dick" RagingBuddhist (10-17: "Effect of Membership Pricing on Decision to Join a Site" thread): "For some reason, I like having food in the fridge more than I do porn on my hard drives." Pat362 (10-21: "What do you think about porn and wearing ..." thread): "I would [add] that if Einstein had seen Carmella [Bing's] boobs in motion he would gladly have volunteered to show her his theories on the Big Bang." Toadsith (5-23: "the more, the merrier" thread) (responding to why more people don't join PU): "I think Porn User's should band together, purchase an Airship and fly it on an epic adventure around the world, dropping pro-porn pamphlets on the unenlightened masses below to guide them to their home away from home: 66.115.137.185." Wittyguy (reply on 5-23): "Toadsith: aka Captain of the PU Hindenberg". Drooler (4-10: "Natasha Shy" post): "Stuffing a soda bottle in her twat! Now that's what I call product placement." Messmer (9-12: "Turn On or Turn Offs" thread): "Maybe they [photographers] are zooming in on the genitals because the model is reading a book or having lunch while makings some enthusiastic noises just to keep us fooled." JBDick (5-6: "Why do Pornstars Dress like Pornstars" thread): "... I'd like to see a porn version of Star Trek - Voyager with 7 of 9 replaced by 6 of 9 .... Now that's a serious boner moment ... where Jeri Ryan sports the Super Galactic Borg Camel Toe ..." So conclude the "gems of the forum". There were many more that could have made the list but I had to shut this mega post down at some point. Feel free to chime in with your own PUey awards, nominations, prizes or gems to date from the forum. As post revisionist note, if you're just stumbling across this post and wondering what happened to 2009, here's the link to the 2009 Forum Awards. Edited on Dec 30, 2009, 07:54pm | |
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| 12-01-08 10:35pm - 5864 days | #2 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
We're getting down there fellow PUers, just a few more awards to go! In an award that defies any respect for conflicts of interest standards, the HILARIOUS POST/THREAD OF THE YEAR AWARD goes to ME!!!, for my 11-28 post in the What would be your '100' site?" thread. Fueled by alcohol, food prep stress and a bad case of pre-Thanksgiving L-tryptophan hallucinations, I came up with a "perfect website review" that managed to offend two major religions, made a mockery of all existing porn sites, and include more gadgets than a Star Trek movie; all of which somehow came together in a humorous fashion. My award is getting to host the PUey's again next year. Friggin' yay. Honorable mentions go to contributors to the threads "Topical Thread - Terminology" which discussed many slang words and phrases for sex and genitalia; "Porn Movies - Best Remakes"; and, "Adult Industry Failing" which sported numerous creative adult movie titles. Next comes the DARWIN AWARD POST/THREAD OF THE YEAR AWARD. For those not familiar with the Darwin Awards, check them out here. Inspired by nature's cruel and sometimes amusing fist of death, this award goes to darealkidd for his thread "1080p / HighDefPorn / etc.". Lured in by a seemingly innocent enough title, viewers were met with the opening post: a slow moving giant train wreck of text 60 lines long, filled with text message shorthand, impenetrable grammar, responses to other forum thread postings, train of thought life stories and other assorted debris; all which earns a score of "10" on the bizzarro meter. Normally, this thread would not qualify for a Darwin award as it did get numerous responses, mostly along the lines of "What the hell is this?". My own internal reaction was to flashback to the movie Pulp Fiction; leaving me to ask, "Who unleashed The Gimp on the forum?". Making darealkidd's award even more improbable is that he explained his computer useage problems in that he lost his right leg, has a nonfunctional left arm and severely injured right hand from a motorcycle accident. How then, you ask, did he manage to pull off this award? Because he his avatar is a FREAKIN' MOTORCYCLE RACER!!!! For his prize darealkidd wins a trip to the upcoming Darwin awards ... on Friday the 13th ... in the ever temporary Mauna Loa Volcano Crater Resort ... with complimentary limo services provided by the "Mr. Magoo and Toonces the Driving Cat Chauffer Service". [To darealkidd, if you're reading this, sorry man. I respect everyone who posts here. Sometimes the spotlight of PUey's has to probe where the sun doesn't wanna shine.] Our last award of the evening is the MR. IRRELEVANT AWARD. Normally, this honor goes to the last person taken in the NFL Draft. This year, however, this lump of coal is being dumped on me. This PUey goes to the thread with the fewest number of views through November 2008 (no links, they're irrelevant). Not only do I claim that honorific title, I also had 4th least viewed thread (thanks to BadAndy and Turboshaft for their earlier pity posts to these threads). How do I feel about this award? I answer: "How does Max Hardcore feel now about prison sex movies?" "How does the school jock who married the cheerleader feel about waking up to his now 40 year old, 400 lb cow moose of wife?" I'll get over it ... but if you see me with an avatar of Jack Nicholson's character from 'The Shining', ranting "Heeeeeere's Johnny", my advice would be to run for it. My prize is the less than inspiring, incomplete works of the not so great Greek poet Mediocroties and, uhh, ... something else ... whatever, it's irrelevant. Edited on Dec 03, 2008, 04:57pm | |
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| 12-01-08 10:34pm - 5864 days | Original Post - #1 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Christmas has come early for some, while others are hoping it never comes again. In case you didn't know, and none of you did, you have all been judged and it is now time for the 2008 Forum Awards (known by it's nickname, the "PUey AWARDS" - named after the contents of my fridge). All the nominees (put forth by me) were judged (by me) and the awards are now handed out (by me ... I'm running a dictatorship here folks, not a democracy). The awards and prize list is long (this automatically gets "Windbag Post of the Year") so strap on your kevlar cod pieces and kiss your downloading ways goodbye for a few minutes. [Note: If you can't handle having won an award, lost an award, failed to receive your prize or feel that you have been inaccurately portrayed in this thread please direct all complaints to me at: wittyguysucks/google.beefdepartment@theinternet.com. All awards are humorous in nature, unaffiliated with the PU/TBP staff and not presented on national tv, so get over it!] Without further delay, let the ceremonies begin! This is a black tie only event so please change into something more appropriate than your porn viewing attire; you know what I'm talking about ... the crusty old "choo-choo train" footsie pajamas ... with the cut out crotch ... with the handy-wipe dispenser / credit card / jump drive bandolier ... or is that just me? First, the POSTER CHILD OF THE YEAR AWARD goes to Toadsith! The man is a machine, already earning the nicknames "The King of Prose" and "Captain of the PU Hindenberg". He truly qualifies as a legend in his own mind after cranking out roughly 350 posts, accounting for nearly 10% of all forum activity. His prize is a Cyrillic alphabet keyboard, which should mitigate his "posting promiscuity" (commonly know as "pp syndrome") and leave us responding to his future posts with the stock phrase "It's all Greek to me". Don't worry, we love ya Toadsith ... at least we say we do ;) Next, we have the AVATAR OF THE YEAR AWARD, which proudly goes to Drooler! Drooler wins this one by "a nose" with his avatar matching his screen name; features a face only a mother could love (sweeping the suburban soccer-MILF vote); and remains tasteful while still suggestive of unpleasant bodily secretions. Drooler's award includes his avatar being used by the SPCA in their spay and neutering program (their slogan is "Prevent someone's future pet from being digitally adopted by some perv and posted on a porn website"). He also gets his avatar used as a background photo prop in an upcoming "Spermswap.com" video. Honorable mentions go to Colm4 just because I like Spongebob; RagingBuddhist as another case of avatar matching screen name; Monahan (sorry to say that "Penguins Go Wee" will not be the next Disney release); and Pazuzu for the self portrait/alien-predator/homemade costume look that is simultaneously both admirable yet undesirable. The SANITATION MAINTENANCE TECHNICIAN (aka JANITOR) OF THE YEAR AWARD goes to Willy Nelson ... I mean Willy The Groundskeeper ... I mean Khan! Yes, Khan, the unheralded and all knowing, who lurks around the basement of the forum 24/7/365 picking up the trash, fixing the broken systems, riding herd on the staff, reading all the stuff we leave lying around, kicking the troublemakers off the premises and giving fatherly advice to the wayward ... sort of like a catholic priest ...but in a good way! Khan's prize is a PU embossed mop handle made of "rich Corinthian leather" (obscure Ricardo Montalban commercial / Wrath of Khan reference) and he gets to serve as an evolutionary role model for offering definitive proof that janitors do in fact walk upright. The ERUDITE THREAD/POST OF THE YEAR AWARD goes to Cybertoad for this thread "What do you think about porn and wearing ...". Little did he know that by asking a benign question about porn stars wearing crosses he would get responses ranging from how to secretly calendar sex with your girlfriend, a historical review of the Christian church's use of the cross, a comparison of the Pythagorian Theorem as it relates to Einstein's theory of relativity, to a deep and pointless discussion of what was best described as "post-modern Judeo/Christian value statements as they relate to public iconology" that drove at least one contributor underground. As a prize all contributors to this thread will receive coupons good for an extra "25 bonus points" on their next college entrance exam and a free lobotomy to ensure no tumors are afflicting their frontal cortexes (Any replies with the phrase "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy" will also immediately receive electroshock therapy). THREAD TITLE OF THE YEAR AWARD goes to NYGiants03 for his thread "BOOBS!!!". Simple, direct, and oozing of grade school humor it drew a huge number of views. NYGiants is awarded a free boob job for himself (didn't some Vegas entourage type guy win a bet a few years ago by having implants and keeping them in for a year). Next time you see him his avatar will sporting a sweet set of DD's courtesy of Dr. Moreau Jr., an unlicensed Mexican prison doctor, and these babies come with the exclusive "mostly hepatitis free" guarantee. Honorable mentions include the threads "I've been unfaithful" by Messmer and "When your ready, where do you put it at?" by Cybertoad. Our first double winner is Toadsith snatching another PUey for BEST POST OF THE YEAR AWARD with his April 25th post in "What should a PU review include". Freakishly long (stand up and take pride in your "length" Toadsith), insightful, logically laid out and a must read for all who post reviews on PU. It's probably the most referred to post in the forum. Seeing as Toadsith has already be bestowed with the "Second Order Grand Poobah in the Loyal Order of the Water Buffalo" (the only higher award is the Congressional Medal of Porn given posthumously to those who lay down their life for the forum), his prize is having his avatar printed on t-shirts across the nation promoting porn literacy ("Be a perv, be like Toadsith"). The REVENGE OF THE NERDS AWARD goes to BadAndy400 and Cybertoad! BadAndy wins for his contributions to the "Porn Mart" thread. Using his Ouija Board (I'm waiting for the "Wii Ouija" to come out :) and his Magic 8 Ball, BadAndy managed to decipher the unwritten conspiracy between porn site marketers and TBP revenue streams. Cybertoad is a co-winner for his superbly geekish use of statistics in the "Adult Industry Failing?" thread. There, Cybertoad proudly demonstrated how the automakers should have laid their pleas for a government bailout by producing more stats than a bad college football BCS ratings poll. For their prize, both will be appointed Undersecretary of the Treasury and required to fix America's lack of economic confidence and return the government budget to the black by February 1, 2009. Failure to do so will result in them being assigned to Dick Cheney's next pheasant hunt. THE BALLSIEST THREAD/POST OF THE YEAR AWARD goes to Splatnet for his thread "DRM - The REAL Truth". Only a few webmasters dare post their Scrooge-like opinions around the forum, let alone a thread in defense of the DRM practice. He got some serious Gitmo' style treatment from some but despite his beating he kept on ticking. His PUey award includes a jar of spicy pickled Rocky Mountain Oysters to enjoy while he licks his wounds (those not familiar with this American mountain delicacy go here). An honorable mention, and a serious one for a change, goes out to MargulisAZ who posted on 9-4 in the "What makes a Addict or Collector" thread that he had some serious life problems with porn and addiction in general and was disabling his account so as to climb back on recovery wagon. We all hope things are turning around for him. Williamj also gets a runner-up nod for his "Something seems a bit odd with pornusers .." thread. Here he laid out his conspiracy theory regarding the big raffle winners and their allegedly cookie cutter reviews. His thread got replies like a turd draws flies, resulting in a back alley beat down that would make Mike Tyson cringe. Edited on Dec 03, 2008, 05:59pm | |
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| 12-01-08 04:55pm - 5865 days | #2 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:15pm | |
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| 11-28-08 03:02pm - 5868 days | #15 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Time for another rambling first amendment soabox post here so put on your chin strap here folks. Last year a US teen girl committed suicide after getting into a conversation with a Myspace friend who was actually the mom of a past friend of this girl. The posts basically told the girl the world would be better off without her and ultimately this girl offed herself. Fast forward to today and earlier this week the mother was convicted of several federal misdemeanor computer fraud counts. This was a political prosecution and she was charged with more serious charges related to the death but was found not guilty on those. What is bothersome is that the convictions came about because the mother misprepresented herself on Myspace as a teenager. Apparently Myspace requires people to be "truthful and accurate" in their profiles. Based upon the prosecution's theory, by signing up a phony account this woman committed computer fraud under a federal law aimed at hackers and spammers by "fraudulently" logging into Myspace. Obviously this case is ripe for all sorts of appeals and the trial level motions are not yet complete so some of these convictions may also be tossed. This is bothersome in two aspects. First, this was a small time contract between the person signing up with the website and the website itself. Since when does the breach of a private contract arise to federal criminal fraud? If it does, how many PU members are also guilty of this crime? Who the heck even reads the terms and conditions, especially when all you have to do is click the "I Agree" icon as opposed to reading pages of legalese? Second, this verdict represents in part an issue of public safety trumping anonymity on the net. I can think of boatloads of reasons why people want to be anonymous on the web, especially on teen oriented web sites like Myspace. Just because someone turns out to not really be who they say they are shouldn't be a crime (not that I endorse cyberbullying by any means). This leads back to my earlier posts about age verification systems being the next big thing in the cyber world. If Myspace adopts this you can bet the calls for porn sites to adopt it won't be far behind. This is one change that will impact pu'ers and remove some of our ability to navigate anonimously in the adult web world. Edited on Nov 28, 2008, 05:48pm | |
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| 11-28-08 02:35pm - 5868 days | #6 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
Yes, happy T-Day (belatedly) to all. It is the second best holiday of the year simply because you get to eat way to much meat, drink a lot of booze and watch football and basketball all day ... this really is a holiday made for men (x-mas only rates higher because you get all of the above plus gifts). Unfortunately, it is followed be damn biggest shopping day of the year. I tried to get a cup of coffee and paper this morning and, this being America, I drove. Crap !!!! I got stuck in a line 10 minutes long of people trying to make the turn into the local shopping center. Then there was that Walmart employee who was killed in the early morning stampede of consumerism today. It's much more civilized and safer to be sittin' at home and surfin' porn. | |
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| 11-28-08 02:28pm - 5868 days | #6 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
I have one dedicated email for adult sites and it probably gets 50 to 60 pieces of crap every day. I never look at it unless I need to verify my signup confirmation or cancellation confirmation. Once in a while there are discounts that come through from past memberships but most of the time they aren't terribly great. My guess is that your email is another way for websites (though not all do this) to make money by selling valid email addresses to spammers. | |
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| 11-28-08 02:20pm - 5868 days | #10 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:22pm | |
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| 11-26-08 09:50pm - 5869 days | #3 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:21pm | |
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| 11-26-08 08:48pm - 5869 days | #2 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 19, 2023, 02:21pm | |
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| 11-26-08 12:57pm - 5870 days | #77 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 11:22am | |
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| 11-25-08 03:51pm - 5871 days | #71 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 11:22am | |
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| 11-25-08 03:33pm - 5871 days | #37 | |
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Wittyguy (0)
Active User Posts: 1,138 Registered: Feb 04, '08 Location: Left Coast, USA |
x Edited on Apr 20, 2023, 12:55pm | |
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